The Harrells

Christmas in Pictures

2012-01-07T23:08:00.000-06:00

Did you know that they celebrate Christmas in Ethiopia on January 7th? See, I'm not late in getting this post up.

It was a wonderful Christmas-- best yet in fact. Hope was beyond tickled at all of the festivities and had the most priceless reaction to the piano she got from Grammy and Grandy, complete with tears of joy. She was so surprised and so grateful, and I think we all might have cried a little bit with her. Lily caught a nasty sinus infection and was pretty miserable on Christmas Eve, but felt better enough on Christmas morning to be mostly herself. She enjoyed absolutely everything and is still playing with all of her new stuff.

We thoroughly enjoyed our rolling cast of thousands, and we still miss all of the out of towners who were here. The Ferrantes NW, Staedlers and Pegises were all here for 5-8 days and we had the best time together. Lily and Hope looooooved having an enlarged fan club, as well as no bed time or nutrition rules. Scurvy was about to set in, as well as pure exhaustion, but we all made it back to school and work last week in one piece. The tree finally got undecorated today, and I finally dismantled my pretty table. I love Christmas. I hate to see it go.

Happy New Year to all of you. Oh wait, I'm even late on that. Enjoy the pics anyway.

Chocolate peppermint birthday cake for Jesus. And Rhys.

My pretty table.

The cutest 7th graders in Texas played for us while we cooked on Christmas Eve. And by we I mean everyone but me.

We decided to do our Christmas Eve as more of a cocktail party instead of having a bajillion apps and then still sitting down to a big dinner, and it was awesome. Way more relaxed and laid back.

We loved having Uncle Kevin here for a whole week and a half!

Kyle got lots of props for his excellent squid frying abilities. Our calamari has been especially good since we switched to my preferred technique of tossing it in flour and spices instead of a heavy breading .

Rhys, meet Hope, Hope, meet Rhys. This might be their second conversation in 6 months. A few nights later he helped her with a reading assignment. Hello, summer job!

Blake, Lily and Marlow posing with their gifts from Nana, which they were allowed to open on Christmas Eve (they always get to open one).

Lily's especially into dinosaurs right now, and wowed us all by putting this puzzle together all by herself. That girl good.

Lily la-hoved this cheeta vest from Rara and Uncle Danny and has worn it almost every day since. It is REALLY cute.

Grandy was even tickled by his gifts at Danny and Tahra's, and Hope wore her jammies there (a big deal since she used to not even wear her jammies downstairs at our house).

It seems like she's been here forever, but this was Grammy Cindy's first Christmas here!

I love to see my brother loving on his girls!

Our only family picture. How do we always do that?

Now some people outside of Texas will also remember the Alamo.

Mackenz was a big hit with the girls. Seems like just yesterday that she was a girl!

The men chatting and watching football. Or whatever Danny wanted to watch.

I don't know what they were talking about, but I definitely know they were not gossiping.

Uncle Joe and Hope

Uncle Davey even took a break from his Alamo Bowl duties (like being in charge of the Heisman trophy!) to come hang with his favorite other family.

Lily's 5th Birthday

2011-12-17T08:37:00.000-06:00

Last Saturday started with gifts from us to kick off the day: a tutu-- or "hula toop"-- which she's newly into, and the same fox pillow pet that Hope has.

Once the temperature reached a balmy 42 or so, we headed to the neighborhood park with a few family and school friends to play and eat butterfly cupcakes. Lily was beyond tickled that a few of her classmates from last year came (Lillian, Colby and Luke) and it was bittersweet having the Foote girls for what was may be our last birthday party together (they moved to Amarillo yesterday) :(

We had an especially hot summer so South Texans aren't quick to complain about the cold. But it was sooooooo cold! The kids did not seem to care at all, but we adults huddled around as long as we could stand it. We sang, ate, pinatad and adiosed.

Happy 5th birthday, Lily!!

Wasn't that a band

2011-12-17T08:16:00.001-06:00

Lily's school had their Christmas program last week and Lily was Angel #7. The angel song is super cute, and we all had it stuck in our heads, even Hope.

There was one, there were two (all the way to 10)

little angels in the band

Oh, wasn't that band,

Christmas mo-orning, Christmas mo-orning...

Ms. Bonnie told the kids to practice and Lily took that seriously. She enthusiastically practiced for everyone we came into contact with, and even serenaded the shoppers of Hobby Lobby and HEB a few times (old ladies love that, turns out). When I tried to sing along, I got a big stop hand and a

"Please don't sing; you're not in pre-k."

Then when the big day arrived, we had this:

(a look of misery, clutching the arms of her teacher, the ~~sucker~~ faithful Ms. Kelle)

Then we moved to this: not quite as miserable and able to stand on her own, but totally not going to smile.

She did, however, have the strength to point to the three kings

who were walking down the aisle to make their presentations to baby Jesus,

to make sure we didn't miss that part.

She acts and sings, but what she really wants to do is direct.

Once the Angel Song started, we moved into this:

...unable to control the fact that she loves. that. song.

Afterward we posed by the tree with both grandmothers, a sister who was so happy to be there to help her, and me and Kyle. Then she hurried back to class without so much as a good-bye (a big improvement over last year when she cried when we left).

And so went our last pre-school Christmas program. (Ever? Only God knows...)

Lily's Birthday Eve

2011-12-14T23:41:00.000-06:00

Uh muh guh. I can't believe my baby will be five tomorrow! I hate when people say that because, really, you should believe it. But five just seems so old. And she still feels like our baby. I think maybe she always will.

There must be something about turning five that feels monumental and old to her too, because she keeps saying she wants to stay little. So we say, "Ok." In fact, I think we'd both be happy if she would have stayed at every age she has always been for the past 3 1/2 years. But then we love the next stage the best. So perhaps getting older is ok after all.

We are bringing star cake pops to school tomorrow and had a little party with family and a couple of classmates on a FREEZING day at the park last weekend. It was the dawning of a new era of small birthday parties for the Harrell girls-- it is so much easier when the number of grandparents outnumbers the number of kids.

Lily helped write the thank yous for her party and phonetically spelled "thanc" you in my parents' card all by herself. She also recognized the word "love" in her current favorite book, Knuffle Bunny Too, and even though the o was a heart, or perhaps because the o was a heart, she was able to read it. This is all of her own doing, and only because she is so naturally interested in reading. I do very little besides read to her.

She also seems to grow every night in her sleep. I promise there have been days that she puts on the same pair of pants that were fine the day before but turned into highwaters overnight. Yes, she has been fond of picking out an outfit for the week lately, but since she's also finally back into girly clothes (thank you, Hope!) I'm all for it. Somehow it doesn't equate to less laundry, but I digress.

Lily has also found a new appreciation for her dad lately, and usually cries when we drop him off at the airport. He's been traveling for work a lot more, and it turns out absence makes the heart grow fonder. It's pretty cute, and though I know Kyle hates being away, I think he forgets as soon as she comes running to him as he walks through the door.

Judy and Emme and Penelope (her imaginary friends) are still the subject of most of her tall tales, and she can't get enough of Cheeto, her Elf on the Shelf. If you ask her how he moves, she will tell you that he's just a tricky fella, that real magic is only from Satan. We tell no lies around here. But don't worry, she also knows that some kids like to pretend that he and Santa are real, and she thinks it's fun to go along with that so she won't go ruining it for your kids.

Speaking of ruining it, we are doing our best not to ruin either birthdays or Christmas by making our kids think that its all about the presents, and it has worked on Lily so far. She loves getting new loot, but really she just comes for the cake. And the pinata-- she still flies her butterfly pinata all around the house a week later. And the kids. She talked for days about her friends from her old class, Lillian and Angelique coming to her party. Social butterfly, this one!

Happy Birthday, baby girl. We love you, young or old, big or small. You have our hearts forever.

Thanksgiving

2011-11-28T20:49:00.000-06:00

Hope's first time on a horse! When she first got home she told us that she'd been kicked by a horse when she was young and was scared of them. Apparently that has worn smooth off! Hooray for all of the progress we are seeing with our sweet girl.

Thanksgiving, part two. There wasn't too much food or anything. In our go-around-the-table thing Hope said she was thankful for the salad that Aunt Tahra made, even after my suggestions of family, etc. Nope, she was thankful for the salad. Perhaps you should forget what I just said about progress.

The world needs to see what Danny's plate looks like on Thanksgiving. Yes, that's tri tip from the night before and six pounds of his mommy's special stuffing that she makes just for him. Mmmm hmmmm, he's 38 going on 6. But we love him anyway.

Tahra avoids the camera like Danny avoids turkey, but I snapped her with Uncle Kev. Everyone was happy to have him here, and we'll be even happier to have him back when No Shave November is over (some kind of fundraiser where people give you money for looking homeless and you give it to kids with cancer or something. Darn proud of that kid).

Hope and her favorite math teacher, aka Nanu.

Marlotta Carlotta Beuregard Dupre and our favorite Thanksgiving elf, Grammy Cindy. (You didn't even know Thanksgiving had elves!)

The oldest girls being tormented by the youngest.

Rhys and Blake, shortly before Rhys undertook teaching me chess. I can already tell he's going to always be better than me.

Uncle Kevin and Rachael. Somehow she lasted 5 whole days with our entire family. Bless her.

Everybody's favorite Nana!

We lassoed all the kids for a pic with Nanu and Nana for their Christmas card. Act surprised when you get it!

Halloween

2011-11-02T20:58:00.000-05:00

We had a fun Halloween on Monday. We got Lily a dragon costume a while ago when they were on sale at Old Navy, and she wore it around the house for a few weeks. On Monday she looked at me like I was nuts when I told her it was time to get her dragon costume on. Duh, Lily is a cat on Halloween. Super duh.

I may have hidden the cat costume that is two sizes too small, so she wore a black dance outfit that she borrowed/stole from the sweet Jones girls, some black ears (that didn't last) and a tiger tail. And her awesome makeup artist dad painted a tiger face on her. She was actually quite adorable, as usual.

Hope didn't quite understand the whole idea of a costume and wanted to wear one of her favorite dresses. Then I came up with the brilliant idea of being a pretty China girl, and she enthusiastically bit. Kyle and Nana took them trick or treating and Hope caught right on. She was soooooo impressed by how much candy she got, and even invited herself into her teacher's house, who lives down the street from the Keupers (where we always spend Halloween).

Lily was not a fan of the "skelican" with the evil laugh in the yard at one of the neighbor's.

Hope said she was afraid when she was a baby.

Lily made friends with all of the 13 year old girls at the party and was bartering with them when they did their big candy trade at the end of the night.

I held down the fort in the kitchen with the other moms. A good time was had by all, but we were ready to move past the evil and the candy and the evil candy and straight into November. Thanksgiving and Christmas, here we come!

Being Lily

2011-10-19T15:13:00.000-05:00

It's been way too long since I've posted about our not-so-little girl. Can you believe she's almost 5??? Me neither. She is finally settling into her new pre-school class and is quite affectionate lately. We can't believe she's learning to read along with Hope and has also accidentally learned a few of Hope's spelling words (like garage and garbage!). I know! She's a joy and a goose and we couldn't love her more. A lot of people comment how tall she's gotten lately, and her legs seem to get longer all the time. Super jealous of those cinnamon sticks.

At the Pre-K ABC parade, showing off/hiding behind her L poster, which included a Lincoln and lipstick. That's my girl. About halfway through she started crying because she didn't like everyone watching her and laughing at her (?). She is just like her dad, who often finds himself at the center of attention but somehow doesn't like when all of the attention is focused on him. It's a strange phenomenon, being Lily and Kyle. And stranger still that it is so. much. the same.

Later that day, posing with Uncle Kevin and Nana, two people who's attention she can never get enough of.

Look who's on the birthday girl's lap! Oh wait, she's on every birthday girl/guy's lap. Without fail. Spotlight? Where?

And yet another grandmother who can't possibly pay more attention to Lily, and yet Lily can't get enough. Grammy spends LOTS of time reading to Lily when we're at the farm. And taking her for Kubota rides. And otherwise doing what she says.

Lily has a new love of girlie dress up since Hope's been around, and she adores this flag scarf that Grammy wears to DAR events. Lily Harrell: patriot.

Just so you don't think she's gone and gotten completely girlie, she was out playing ball with the boys. It was so bizarre to have a 4 1/2 year old girl as the GM, head coach and quarterback, that Breckett up and walked away, with all of his pride intact. Good for you Breckett, I agree that she's safer as the mascot or playing the "tube" in the marching band like she's always wanted to do.

Lily loved playing with Aisling when the Cordeiros came to visit from California, and they were both tickled to share a glass of water like 50s BFFs. I feel like I've known her mom since the 50s but not quite.

Two Doors

2011-09-12T11:08:00.000-05:00

For some reason (perhaps the remnants of an ear infection?), Lily FREAKED OUT when I dropped her off at school on Thursday. I mean, freaked out. It was very unlike her, so I was a little concerned. I didn't get a call from the school so I knew she quickly calmed down, but I was still anxious to see how she was when I picked her up. Not only was she totally fine, but she was bubbling over with excitement to show me something. I got a little nervous when she led me into the bathroom in the corner of their classroom, but thankfully it wasn't someting potty related (for a change). "Mom, there are TWO doors in this bathroom, and guess. where. that one. goes?" Um, I can't even begin to. "MISS BONNIE'S MUSIC CLASS!" Have you ever heard of anything so cool in your life? Neither has Lily. Forget toys this Christmas, I'm going to just show her that there are TWO doors to our house, and the back one goes to the dog's bathroom.

Lily's First Day of Pre-K

2011-09-06T09:58:00.000-05:00

Wow, what a difference a year makes! Last year the whole house was aflutter, getting Lily ready for her first day of pre-school. This year was more like, "oh yeah, Lily starts school tomorrow I think...." (Well, maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration.)Last year she was nothing but excited, and this year she was a bit nervous. We have been talking all weekend about how we'd have to leave her at the door so she could go in and start her jobs right away (putting away her lunchbox, etc.) and she started wailing early this morning that she wanted me to go in with her. When it came down to it, she walked in with only slight hesitation and the promise of an after school treat (is that a bribe?).

Her teachers are super sweet and she has some old friends and some really sweet new kids in her class, so I know she will have a great day. I'm just praying she has homework because she's been REALLY excited about that since her teachers told us about it at Meet the Teacher last week. Her eyes got so wide, and she had an immediate swagger. Yeah, that's right- I'm big, I have homework like my sister.

It really seems surreal that she is going to be 5 in just three short months. It is such a cliche, but the time really does go so fast. I love her more with each passing stage, so while it does seem a little sad that our baby and toddler days are long gone, it sure beats the alternative. And it doesn't make me so sad that I want to go out and get another baby or toddler. At all. Lily's right-- big kids are where it's at.

Rhys's Birthday Party (and bonding)

2011-07-16T16:40:00.000-05:00

Last night we celebrated Rhys's 11th birthday with spaghetti and a decadent chocolate mint cake with york peppermint patty frosting. The best part was hearing everyone's favorite thing about Rhys, a new family tradition we've been doing on birthdays. Rhys got big shouts out for being kind, loving, generous and gracious. Hope asked Marlow what we were doing, and then said that she would also like a chance to bless Rhys, so she wished him happiness this year. It was so cute!

Anyway, back to Rhys-- I can't get enough of his great big smile, so I included my favorite pics of his award winning mug from last night. Love that kid. He thanked me for being "the official awesome cake maker," so Teet, I think you're going to have to buck up and visit during the summer to win back your title.

Hope interacted with her cousins a lot more last night than she has before. She and Marlow "talked" on the iPad for quite a while, and Hope even gave her some gifts (things of mine that were on her bookshelves-- nice). She really is a very sweet girl. Isabel spent the evening annoyed that her sister swooped on her, but I reminded her that she will have plenty of time to spend with Hope come the start of school in six weeks. (Six weeks-- yikes!!)

Hope seems to be warming up to her dad a bit, and she explained to me this morning that the problem was that he was opposite of her. I told her that he and I are quite different also, and introduced her to the saying, "opposites attract" and said she would probably marry someone very different from her. She thought that was hilarious. I will think it's hilarious when it comes true.

She is excited about spending the evening with her small group from church. These girls have been....in a word... amazing. What an answer to prayer! The two leaders are college girls, one of whom speaks Mandarin and they are delightful young women.

Tonight is actually a slumber party, but I'll be picking her up before bed. I'm sure she'd have no problem staying over, but it's too soon for that. We are going to be in the trust-building phase with her for quite some time, and it's tricky for an older kid who doesn't necessarily "need" you. Just as Lily was fine falling asleep by herself until she began to feel herself needing me (at which point she panicked and developed an anxious attachment, aka velcro baby), Hope is still in the stage of not needing me, so I need to be "ever present" until we start to build trust. I do as much as I can for her (make her meals, do her laundry, bring her snacks, etc.), and what she does for herself, I try to do with her (we put away her clothes together, do dishes together, etc.). It is the opposite of what most parents do with their adolescents (which is to try to teach them to take care of themselves) so it's counter-intuitive, but very important in the bonding process. It's also a great way to get to know each other, and it beats the heck out of carrying around a 25 lb baby all day. (God, I know you're listening so I will adopt another baby if you make me ask me to. But please ask someone else.)

In other news, I found out that our insurance added Hope retroactively, and they didn't increase the rate due to her pre-existing conditions. Hooray! Thank you for praying-- it worked! They didn't even make me pay for her first physical, so what we've spent so far will be applied to our deductible. Thank you Jesus! I knew when we said yes that God would provide for Hope's medical care, so I am thrilled at this news but not surprised. He goes before us every time and there is no need to worry. Not ever.

We are home!

2011-07-01T23:12:00.002-05:00

We made it home safely from China last night. You can read all about it on Hope's blog.

Leaving for China!

2011-06-14T23:35:00.000-05:00

This blog has come full circle, as we're headed back to China again, which was the original reason for starting this blog 6 years ago. I'll be posting to Hope's blog, and I hope you'll join us and pray for us as we become a family of four!

Wow-- it's been a long time!!

2011-05-25T14:29:00.000-05:00

Lily as Tigress from "Com Poo Panda" - her favorite character lately

Stompin in puddles in her favorite shirt lately-- a $3.99 steal from the airport in OKC

Pics from cooking class. She liked it and took it very seriously. (sorry they're blurry)

I've been very bad about updating this blog lately because I've been over at Hope's blog. We got our travel approval this week, so I've been busy confirming travel details. We leave June 15th, meet Hope on June 19th (Father's Day!) and come back June 30th. We are so excited! Three weeks feels like a long time but I know it will go quickly, especially since we'll have visitors in the meantime (the Hahn's for the weekend--yay; and my parents until they find a new house-- double yay).

Lily turns 4 1/2 on the day we leave for China and she seems so grown up lately. She really loves numbers and letters and at the rate she's going, she'll be reading by fall--through NO fault of my own. She's really interested in what sounds letters make and how words are spelled, so I am literally an innocent bystander watching her learn to read. It actually might come in very handy that she and Hope are learning to read and write English at the same time.

Lily has also gained a couple of new friends lately-- Judy and Emmie. We haven't technically met these friends, but we know LOTS about them. Judy is forty-sixty-five and is in kindergarten. She lives in our neighborhood. Or my parent's neighborhood. Or whatever neighborhood we're driving through that strikes Lily's fancy. Some days not a sentence comes out of her mouth that isn't about Judy. I almost jumped across the car to muzzle Kyle on a recent car trip to Dallas when he started to mention Judy. Once she starts.... oy. She also texts and emails her, and occasionally they talk on the phone.

She's gotten really tall lately and is already too tall for some of her 4T pants. That would explain the numerous "eating days" she's had lately (as opposed to a regular day when she consumes about 10 calories). We were at the Wittmaiers' for dinner the other night and they couldn't believe how much she was eating.

Though she's choked down some healthy food on her eating days, she continues to be a candy fiend and her ears will perk up from across the house if she hears some type of wrapper being undone. A couple of months ago she heard a wrapper rustling and rushed into the kitchen to see Kyle standing suspiciously close to the candy jar. She asked him if he was eating candy and he said no. She didn't believe him and said, "Smell my breath!"

Cousin Funnies

2011-04-07T15:48:00.000-05:00

Blake: "Lily, you're such a joy!"

Me: "Awwww, Blake, that was so sweet! You are both such a joy to me!"

Blake, seemingly very confused by my praise: "Uh, what does joy mean?"

Lily: "I want a brother."

Me: "You might be able to have a brother someday."

Lily: "I want one just like Rhys. And a sister just like Marlow."

Me: "Well, Hope is going to be a sister kind of like Marlow. And maybe someday you can have a brother Rhys's age. But he'll probably be from China."

Lily: "NOOOOOOO! I don't like kids from China!!!!"

Viva Fiesta

2011-04-07T15:08:00.000-05:00

There is a two week long event in our city known as Fiesta, and in the 7 years that we've lived here, we've never participated in a single event. When we first moved here I asked our friend Dennis what it was like and he said, "I'll show you. Get in that closet over there with 50 strangers and I'll splash some beer on you. That's what it's like." Needless to say, we stayed away after that glowing recommendation.

However, we jumped at the chance to make a shoebox float for the Fiesta Parade at Lily's pre-school today. And by we I mean Kyle and Grammie. Kyle built the rolling base, and Grammie was here to do the rest. Lily even got to help a bit. And by a bit, I mean she got to place one little fuzzy ball wherever she wanted to, within the one inch parameter given. Enjoy the results:

Adoption Discrimination-- Prayers Needed!

2011-03-28T21:41:00.000-05:00

Please head over to read the story of little Kirill, a little boy with Downs who is being denied adoption approval by a judge in his country simply because he has Downs. His mom is my dear friend Lisa's cousin, and they are devastated as you can imagine, but they believe that God can move mountains to bring their son home. Will you please join me in praying for a miracle here?

I have had a love for kids with Downs Syndrome since volunteering with Special Olympics as a kid, and have recently fallen in love with a little girl that I get to take care of in the church nursery who was also adopted from Ukraine as a baby. She is such a joy! Anyway, it makes it hit even closer to home to know what awaits this little boy if when he is able to come home.... and what awaits those who aren't ever placed in a family...

~~I wonder if God has something up His sleeve here, as Kyle also has a big heart for these special kiddos but I'm not going to say it outloud.~~

More Adoption Progress

2011-03-21T22:29:00.000-05:00

I'm totally double posting, which is probably annoying to the three of you who read both blogs, but we got our official adoption approval from China today (our LOA)! It came really quick, so I didn't even answer the phone when I saw our agency on caller ID (I was on an important conference call, which always seems to be the case when important adoption calls come in). The thought did cross my mind that today was the 4 week mark, but in my mind the real waiting began today. But in God's overwhelming grace, it also ended!

So that wait ended and another one began-- the wait for travel approval (2-3 months). There are about 5 little steps before we're actually waiting for our TA, that my brain refuses to remember the details of what they are and what I'm supposed to do for each one. It is completely different than what we had to do for Lily's adoption (pre-Hauge, when you got your TA a month or less after your LOA) so I am clueless. I just know I have a packet of stuff to mail back to immigration tomorrow as soon as the FedEx from our agency gets here with a very pretty and very official piece of Chinese paper "seeking our confirmation" to adopt Hope. Yes sir, we seek to confirm that Hope is a Harrell!

If our TA comes quick, we can travel in early June. If it comes medium, then mid-late June. If it comes late, it will be more like July. I just wanted to avoid August (too close to school starting and even swampier) so I am thankful for all of these potential travel scenarios. And especially thankful that we have a good chance of being home in time for my cousin Matt's family's visit for July 4th.

Onward to getting Hope's room ready and planning for language learning...

The Rodeo

2011-03-15T20:21:00.000-05:00

If we're facebook friends then you saw these rodeo pictures a month ago. I can't believe it's taken me this long to get them on the blog. Slacker! Anyway, our annual family trip to the rodeo was great. Lily especially loved the "America Round" and her cousins were good sports about riding it with her. She embarassed us in the "vibe room" with Miranda and Blake by eating all of Miranda's popcorn. She didn't want any of the $6 hot dog we had just bought her, but all of a sudden she was super starving for famous popcorn. Awesome.

We kept wondering what Hope would think of a rodeo... In less than a year, we'll know!

A Birthday Potpourri Post

2011-03-10T19:42:00.000-06:00

Today's my birthday, and it has been a wonderful day! Ok, maybe not like the birthdays of yore, when I indulged all day long in whatever I wanted, but still, a good day for a responsible 36-year-old mom. (By the way-- did you know that I am now in the 36-50 year old bracket? 50? Really?)

Kyle gave me a most precious gift this morning, then he took Lily to school per her request and I got to work. Two marathon conference calls later, my mom, Tahra and Blakey-doo-dah picked us up to take us to Dough for lunch. I can't wait till heaven, where I'm sure their arugula and proscuitto pizza will be served for lunch every day, and I will have a personal burrata maker. Delicious beyond words, even for a food city. Unbelievable for San Ant~~aco~~onio. Tomorrow night I requested my mom's classic pasta for my family party. Yum, more carbs.

Ok, enough about me- how about some Lily updates.

First of all, she has been eating like crazy lately so she must be growing again. Highwaters, here we come. Her legs are SO long already (yes, I'm super jealous!) Long, brown legs....sigh...I think we'll all have those in heaven too.

But I digress. Lily still has quite an opinion about her clothes, and despite my bi-monthly tirade about having to fold and put away every stinkin clo in her room, she still changes outfits several times a day. She came downstairs on Monday night to go out to dinner with our friend Jon in the following doozy: a black velvet shirt with a red satin bow at the collar, and teal adidas track pants. Yeah, that's right. And I went ahead and let her wear it, thinking I've seen worse at the taco shop we were headed to. And besides, what do I care if people think I'm the one who picked it?

She has also realized that the pink suede adidas that I though didn't fit her anymore, do in fact still fit. So she was THRILLED to realize she could be dressed head to toe in "buridas," her word for adidas. And when I say head to toe, I mean this child zips that sweatshirt up to her neck. She is so RunDMC.

This morning George and Phyllis called to tell me happy birthday, and all Lily wanted to know when I got off the phone was if they were "sad and all alonely" because they miss her. She also always asks whether they've been crying for her, and she's not satisfied unless the answer is yes. She is a mess, I tell ya, a mess. Who wants their grandparents to cry?

In adoption news, we are about half-way through the wait for our next approval from China, which is our official approval to adopt Hope (we already got pre-approval, which means that unless anything major changes with our family, they will grant official approval.) People usually travel 3-4 months after that, so its still looking like June, July or August. Praying for June and against August, and July is the most likely. But what do I know.

I have also started to freak out recently that as far away as July seems, I know the time will fly so I need to begin to prepare for this sweet child. I have mandarin phrases to learn, a room to prepare, not to mention a two week trip to China to pack for (that alone will take me a month. I'm not exaggerating). I'm also realizing that it may be a harder transition for Lily to share her throne than for Hope to come to a foreign country, so I've been spending a lot of time praying about how to mitigate that potential disaster.

Speaking of the little princess, it's time to get her to bed, so I'll sign off without any pictures. Sorry... I have not been good about photos lately, but there are some new ones of Hope that we were given, thanks to a kind stranger-turned-adoption-friend, so head over to Hope's blog to see.

A Few of My Favorite Girls

2011-02-10T21:30:00.000-06:00

We have had sleepovers lately with 4 of our favorite girls-- Libby and Gracie and Isabel and Marlow. It was a school night both nights the Feete spent the night so we took this picture before we loaded up for school. When Isabel and Marlow spent the night they wanted to make something, so this pic was taken mid-chocolate cupcakes. Sadly they forgot to take them home! Kyle was very disappointed about that...

We love all of these girls so much and can't wait until Libby and Gracie's big sister Josie and Hope come home so they can join our fun sleepovers! Hopefully Josie will be home this summer too so there won't be too many more sleepovers without them.

what's going on at the farm

2011-02-10T21:20:00.000-06:00

This is a fun time of year at the farm since all the cows are having calves. See that little guy by his mama? There's an even newer one that was born this morning, but his mama had him hidden away.

Kyle showing George how his Texas worm harvester works. He made it himself!

Despite the look on her face, Punky Brewster/Poker Face Magoo has loved getting all bundled up to go outside in the cold, complete with a scarf because her "neck is cold!" We are gearing up for another hard freeze tonight, and with no heater. (!!) Despite the indoor frosty weather, we all slept better than ever last night, huddled under about a million antique quilts made by Phyllis' mother. So I think I'm gonna start turning off the heater at night at home. I think it might be the second night in 3 years that Lily didn't wake up during the night. An arctic blast miracle!

I woke up really early because I was too cold to stay up late last night, and because I was the first one up, I had to start the fire. Don't you love that-- a house full of pioneer people and the city girl was the one up at dawn to start the fire. Needless to say, I wasn't successful, but I was loud enough to stir the pioneers.

Adoption Progress

2011-02-10T09:08:00.000-06:00

In case you don't read Hope's adoption blog, I thought I'd fill you in on our adoption progress this week. We got our immigration approval (i800a) about a week before we expected it, so Tuesday we went to Austin to get it state certified, and yesterday we drove to Houston to have it authenticated by the Chinese Consulate. Today we go pick it up and send it off to our agency. Hopefully they will send it to China tomorrow, which will give us a DTC (dossier to China) date of February 11th. Hoping for a log in date (LID), the official date from which we'll wait for our next approval (LOA) in the February 20s, but it may be later since a bunch of unprocessed dossiers piled up in front of ours from the Chinese New Year holiday. Oh well. The target in my mind was March 1, so anything close to that will be good. I will choose joy!

Also, we got a letter back from Hope! She told us she liked the stuff we sent and she wants to know our favorite colors so she can "give us a happy surprise when she comes home." How sweet! We also got updated measurements which indicate that she's not as small as we thought-- a size 10/12!

Overall, it's been a really great week for adoption news! We are staying at the farm all weekend, which is extra exciting since there are snow flurries. Not that fun to drive in (it was actually freezing rain yesterday) but fun to look at from the inside by the fire.

Lily at 4

2011-01-22T12:58:00.000-06:00

Think it's time to do another post about what our little girl is like these days.

In a word, awesome.

In 11 words: busy, smart, sassy, bossy, stinkin adorable, nosy, perceptive, tenderhearted, imaginiative, tall, and social.

One of our favorite stories lately is from the other day when she was being particularly tooty and started crying because I sent her upstairs to get dressed by herself. Her dad rescued her and when he brought her back downstairs (no doubt in either her kitty costume or some type of graffic tee and highwater jeans) and asked her why she was so upset still, she said, "I am crying because I have a tender heart!"

For the past several months she has started crying during the part in Fox and the Hound when Tod's mom leaves him in the forest. It is the saddest and sweetest thing you have ever seen, and it's prompted lots of conversations about movies not being real, and why certain things make us sad (that's where she got the tender heart excuse). I have not led into conversations about moms who leave their kids alone for their ultimate benefit--even though I have reason to believe she might be making that connection-- more on that later. Anyway, she loves the movie, so maybe she'll just be like me and love things that make her cry.

Her vocabulary has continued to expand and she talks a lot more like a kid every day. She now says most words correctly, although she still substitues "nuse" for use, but so does Blake so she might just be copying. She also says "all both," as in, "we can all both have a cupcake because there's 2 left." And this morning she said, "can we take that same airplane when we go to China anothergan?" As in "another" and "again" together. Clever, I say. She doesn't say "wellow" for yellow anymore, although sometimes she calls it lemon ("Mom, do you want a lemon paper or a white paper?).

Back to her China story. We've always been very candid about her China story, so her whole life she's heard the basic facts of her life in China. She's always loved the story and lately she's taken more interest in new parts of it. The other day, out of the blue she said, "was I inside or outside?" and I instantly knew what she meant. Another day she asked if she was waiting in a hallway, and again, I knew exactly what she was referring to. These are hard conversations to have (for me, mostly), but important ones for her to hear the truth about, in an age-appropriate and tender but matter-of-fact manner. She should never feel like we hid anything from her, especially the hard parts. This is the reason why we don't tell her things that aren't true about Santa Claus or the tooth fairy. If she one day realizes we lied about that, what else are we lying about? And she should never read through her history and get punched in the gut by the truth because she always thought she was delivered to the orphanage by a stork, for instance.

And even though the basic facts of most Chinese orphans are widely known, we'll keep the details as Lily's to decide to share if and when she wants to. I made the mistake early on of telling a detail to someone who then blurted it out at a party. To her it was just an interesting fact, but to me it was like a kick in the face that she would treat my baby's story so cavalierely. And though she was too young at the time, imagine what it could be like for Lily at 8 or 10 or 14 to overhear something like that. A little kid in hearing distance then said, "I don't know why her parents did that, she's so cute." The little girl was only reacting to what she heard, but it points to the reason why we don't share the details. You never know when other little ears could be listening, and then later share on the playground. Even innocently, those things could sting, and there's enough sting to go around already.

So... to bring it back to a lighter note, enjoy these pics of Lily that you've already seen if you got a Christmas card. (And if you didn't, it's only because I don't have your address)

Happy New Year!

2011-01-03T22:52:00.000-06:00

I say this every year, but wow. 2010 went fast, and what a year it was. We experienced a few fun firsts, like Lily's first year at pre-school, my first experience as a working mom and our first family trip to Nashville. The hardest part of the year, finding out that a son from Nepal was not to be, was closely followed by our greatest joy of the year: learning that we had another daughter in China. No doubt the greatest joy of 2011 will be welcoming Hope into our family! And who knows-- China just started allowing families to reuse their paperwork for another special needs adoption within a year, so perhaps 2011 will bring yet another sweet surprise!

God has taught me so much about His love, sovereignty and faithfulness in the past year. This year I am praying to see His might, and the transformational power of His love in the life of our new daughter, and I'm praying that He would continue to transform us as we watch His plan for Hope unfold. He has already done so much in showing us how to trust Him with things we can't do in our own strength, experience or capability. I love that He is teaching me to live without fear, to live an abundant life in Him regardless of circumstances. There's no "what if" He hasn't assured me He can handle.

May your 2011 be filled with abundance-- the heavenly kind!

What a Wonderful Christmas!

2010-12-29T17:54:00.000-06:00

The Christmas Eve Miracle-- Lily actually CHOSE this dress to wear (???). She only wore it for about 30 minutes, but I'm not complaining.

They were so excited to open their pillow pets from Nana, which was their one Christmas Eve gift they got to open.

Me and my brothers, and the only pictoral evidence that I was there.

Danny "locking in the flavor" on his famous shrimp" which I accidentally suggested he skip this year. Hence the apron I made him as a peace offering.

Pretty table, courtesy of Phyllis Harrell, table designer extraordinaire.

Christmas Morning

Lily woke up at about 7:00 and before her eyes were even opened, said, "Is it Christmas? Right now? Did Santa come? Can I open my presents?" And just like on her birthday, she couldn't believe that my answer was finally yes!

She loved her doll house and played with it while the rest of us opened our presents.

Then (after a costume change into her new Dora jammies) she saw the box for the Hotwheels racetrack and yelled, "WOW!!!" It is so fun to see Pokerface Magoo react like that, because usually she gives the cool-girl-totally-bored-and-unimpressed-by-everything look (you know, like a teenager). As you can see, the racetrack was also a big hit with Kyle.

This is a glimpse of the Pokerface Magoo look. She was SOOOOOOO excited to get a motorcycle just like Blake got, but was trying equally hard to act like it was no big deal.

As Tahra was putting this adorable hat on her head, she politely whispered, "I don't want that." Thankfully she didn't let the temporary nature of this gift stop her from posing in it with Marlow.

Marlow and the Beau Ideal headband I got her and Rhys with his new book.

Uncle Kevin with his LJH original.

Lily telling Nanu the names of all of the people in the picture (in case he forgot the names of his other grandchildren).

Christmas Dinner

Phyllis and Cara were on Team Beet Salad, which was super delicious. We like to serve plated salads on Christmas and I look forward to picking it all year. This year was arugula tossed with an orange vinaigrette served with roasted beets cut into the shape of Christmas ornaments and crumbled goat cheese. Two beet-dyed thumbs up!

Another Phyllis Harrell table. I don't know what I'd do without that lady.

Hope was in our hearts and on our mantle this Christmas (and in frames all over the house). Can't wait till she's at our table instead next Christmas! (hopefully by Father's Day!)

It was a super chilly night, but the boys took the opportunity to enjoy the new covered patio with a little fire. And marshmallows of course, because dads + kids + fire = marshmallows.

This picture of my mom and Danny sums up what a wonderful Christmas we had. Happy Birthday Jesus! Thank you for giving us a reason to celebrate our eternal and abundant life with (most of) the people we love the most.

Four At Last!

2010-12-16T11:44:00.000-06:00

Lily woke up before dawn yesterday and with a scratchy, sleepy voice asked, "Mom, I am 4? Right now? Not 3 1/2?" And as if she didn't believe that I was telling the truth, she asked over and over again until the sun rose. (So much for getting more sleep as she gets older.) As my mom so aptly put it: four at last, four at last, thank God Almighty, she is four at last! As my dad said, we can enjoy 6 months of "age peace" until Blake turns 5 and Lily starts asking if she is almost 5....

Uncle Davey volunteered to be the birthday party photog which is awesome because I think I have all of 4 pictures on my camera, none of them blogworthy. So enjoy the party through David's (much better) eyes!

I love this pic of Lily and one of her classmates. Notice the party hat, which we couldn't not believe she INSISTED on wearing the whole day. This is the child who will barely keep socks or shoes on, let alone accessories. The wonders never cease.

To my very great surprise she didn't seem to mind that we didn't light the candles (too windy). As soon as the singing stopped I realized why: she cares far more about licking the frosting off the bottom of candles than she cares about blowing them out.

Don't ask me why we had a unicorn at a monkey party. Ok I'll tell you anyway: because I let Lily pick it out. I'd rather let her have fun parties then be all matchy matchy. So there. And it doesn't bother me. I promise. It doesn't. It doesn't.

Libby, aka Babe Ruth

If you've ever wondered what a sugar/Cheeto coma looks like, here it is:

Three Fourths of the Cutest Girls on the Planet

2010-11-24T13:10:00.000-06:00

Love, love, love these girls!! It's become a tradition for my nieces (and last year my nephews too) to help me decorate for Christmas, so Isabel and Marlow came over the other night to help. There was about 10% decorating going on, and the remaining 90% was what Kyle would call chicken frying. I'm not exactly sure what that means, but you'd know it if you saw it. And if you knew these goofy girls. Hope, you have big fun waiting for you!

The Kitchen Sink

2010-11-12T15:57:00.000-06:00

This post has a little bit of everything-- Halloween, our friend Cara's birthday party, and lots of family pictures. I've been trying to take more pictures to put in Hope's photo album, can you tell? I even got good pictures of both of my parents-- a total miracle! :)

I've been busy with BSF, work and adoption paperwork, so I haven't had much time for blogging. So I'll just leave you with a few Lily-nisms from the past couple of weeks:

Trickorcheese= Chuck E. Cheese

She walked up to a police officer at a party we were at (he was an invited guest, it wasn't a rowdy party) and said, "We always buckle!"

Boys are "handsful," girls are pretty

Speaking of handsful, check out Lily and Hope's daddy:

Lily and Miss Cara, who graciously let Lily pretend it was "their" birthday

It's become a tradition to take a picture with Nana on Halloween. Unfortunately it seems to be the only day of the year we get a picture of her!

Best buds!

Lily and Marlow, aka Marlotta Carlotta Beauregard Dupree

Sweet Rhys

Isabel and her cello

Lily and her beloved Nanu, aka Turkey Lips and Big Turkey Lips

Good Lookin' Eyes

2010-10-26T23:15:00.000-05:00

If you need help finding something, ask Lily because she has "good lookin' eyes."

She's been using those good lookin' eyes on letters and numbers lately, for which she's rediscovered her love, probably because of pre-school. She LOVES being the ABC helper at school, which goes something like this: "Everybody sits on their star, then Miss Tanya says, 'What's our letter?' and I say, 'It's the F' and I take it out of the pocket and show it to all my friends like this, and say, 'What F says? Says like, 'Fuh,' then I put it back and sit down." She can describe in detail each of the 10 jobs that the kids rotate each school day, and she l-o-o-o-ves every single one of them. Forget child labor laws, we are putting this child to work ASAP.

Last night in the middle of one of her dog training sessions, Lily was looking at Gus and Hazel's tags and said, "Gus spells G-U-S. Hazel spells H-A-Z-L" She wasn't looking at their tags when she said that. Then tonight I asked her how to spell Gus: "G-U-S" and Hazel, "H....Z....(something unintelligible like when Tommy Boy puts a niner in there)" But isn't that impressive for a not-yet-4-year-old? I mean, I get it for kids of good moms who actually try to teach their kids stuff like that, but I don't even try. You just can't stop good thinkin' brains, I guess!

I'm not sure this is valid, but I feel like I can brag about her without being obnoxious because I can take zero responsibility for her charm or brilliance. I mean, she didn't inherit from me and she sure as heck doesn't learn it from me. Is it still obnoxious?? Don't answer that.

A Reminder About Why

2010-10-24T16:26:00.000-05:00

No one has really come out and said this in so many words, but we know many are wondering what in the world we're doing. In many a furrowed brow we've seen your questions: "Do you have any idea how hard this is going to be?" or "I'm not sure you really know what you're getting yourselves into."

That's true.

We don't know exactly how difficult different aspects of Hope's adoption will be. We anticipate some challenges with language, her vision, and teaching her how to be a part of a loving family, but having never experienced any of those challenges, we don't really know what they'll be like.

We also know that she may not respond with the grateful heart that we all hope our kids will when we sacrifice for them. Deep down we all want to be thanked and recognized for our love, our obedience and our hard work. We want to see fruits of our sacrifice, lights at the end of the tunnel and happy endings.

But that's not really the kind of love that Jesus expects of us. That's human love, pagan love, easy love. It's self-serving and comfortable, and I'm super good at it.

What I'm not so good at is loving someone who doesn't love me back, obeying commands that sound nuts, or sacrificing for no clear prize at the end.

That's exactly the kind of love that Jesus showed us, and the kind of love He's called me to. It's the kind that makes me rely on Him because I know I'm not capable of it in my selfish, lazy, comfort-seeking flesh. And it's the kind that has the best prize of all-- knowing that I'm right where I should be, not serving myself for once, but instead finally meeting my purpose for living: to glorify my Father, the One who loved me when I was unlovable, sacrificed for me when I didn't deserve it, and did it all to receive nothing in return. Romans 5:6 is where this comes from: "You see, just at the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly." As I was reading that today I was tickled to be reminded of the verses that appear right before it: "Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, wehave peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, ²through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. ³Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; ⁴perseverance, character; and character, hope. ⁵And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us."

Indeed, Hope will not disappoint us because God has poured out His love into our hearts!

(Head over to Lorraine's blog to see what inspired this post. Thanks Lorraine!)

Big News!

2010-10-21T17:09:00.001-05:00

The short version is- we are adopting from China again! This time it will be quite a bit different, as we have already identified our daughter and China has already pre-approved us to adopt her!

Here are some answers to questions we've been getting:

What's her name? Her name will be Hope YuBing (unless she already has her heart set on an American name, which I'm already praying about...what if she has her heart set on Janet or Susan or something perfectly suited for a 40 year old??)
How old is she? As Lily's t-shirt suggests, Hope is older than Lily, in fact she turned 12 last Monday-- yes I said 12! Suddenly we have the bookends of the family and suddenly we are young parents! Overnight I became a mom when I was 23 :) Ironically I've called Lily "little sister" all along.
Where does she live? Hope lives in Beijing and she currently attends a boarding school for the blind. Yes I said blind, but she's not blind-- she has albinism, which has caused some vision problems. She probably has "getting around vision" meaning she can see well enough to get around but she has learned Braille since it is a more efficient way for her to read.
Do you know anything else about her? She is described as smart and kind, she likes every subject in school (including English), and she loves to sing. Hope's last measurements indicate that she's little bitty-- she was only 55 lbs at 10 years old. For perspective, my nephew Rhys is 75lbs at 10 and is slender. We are hoping to get updated measurements.
Does she know about us? Probably not yet-- I don't think the orphanage or boarding school are officially notified until much later in the process but we are free to contact her so we'll be sending letters and care packages (that will hopefully get to her...)
When can she come home? There are about a million more steps in the process from here, but we are well underway with the paperwork. We will probably go to China sometime next summer, and we're praying that it will be even sooner (May-ish).

There is SO much to this wild story about how Hope came to be a Harrell, and I've started recording it on her very own blog: http://plansforhope.blogspot.com/.

Finally, look at her sweet face! This top picture is about 2 years old, and we think the bottom one is more recent. We think she looks like an absolute doll, but more importantly, we think she looks like ours. Hang on sister, I know it's taken a long time but your family is finally coming for you!

Star is Home!

2010-10-13T18:59:00.000-05:00

Lily and Isabel were SO unbelievably excited to go to the farm last weekend to see Star now that he's been trained. They got to ride around on him and George and Kyle were good sports about leading him around. And around. And around. Unfortunately he's too stubborn yet to be ridden by Isabel, but she happily tolerated the corral circles when all she wanted to do was take off on a trail ride through the woods.

Speaking of the woods, Isabel did have her first trail riding experience as a driver instead of a passenger on the little Kubota. She did really good for the first time ever behind a wheel, but I hereby declare that I am not looking forward to ever teaching a teenager how to drive. To add some excitement to the experience, Isabel learned the all-important off-roading lesson about stopping in sand. Thankfully folks are nice in the country and Mr. Ronnie helped pull us out, saving us from the ridicule of having to call home. I was going to try to keep it between us girls but before we'd even pulled all the way into the carport Lily yelled, "WE GOT STUCK IN THE SAND!!!!!!!!!" Even if Little Miss Bullhorn hadn't shouted it from the rooftops, surely my in-laws would have found out anyway since I stupidly announced to Ronnie where we'd met him a while back, thinking that would make him want to help us. Duh, he would have helped us anyway, and now I'm double-told on. So, the secret's out-- I'm still a city girl. However, it appears I'm the only one in the family...

Lily's Office

2010-10-13T12:25:00.000-05:00

I've told you before that Lily sees no difference between her and the average 35 year old living under this roof. So it was perfectly natural that she set up an office for herself in our house, just like Kyle and I have. She dragged out an old keyboard, which she "plugged into" a box (brilliant, I think), got her "business" (a clipboard with her "lesson" on it) and a pen and got to work. She is quite a diligent worker as you might imagine, and while I was taking these pictures she asked if I would please excuse her, as she was trying to work. Mmmm hmmmm.

First Day of School

2010-09-16T13:08:00.000-05:00

Lily LOVES pre-school! She doesn't say much when we ask how it went or what they did, but things come out as she plays or right before bed ("See what this letter says? It says "P, pah" for purple" or "My teacher said to zip my lips at rest time."). She cried the first day during rest time, but the next two school days she was zonked out when we got there to get her (yes, we, it's a group effort).

This morning when we walked down the hall toward her class and she saw one of her teachers and one of her friends ("LiliAN") at the door, she got the biggest, purest grin on her face. That told me all I need to know-- little sis loves school as much as we both did!

Off to "Kindergarten"

2010-08-27T13:52:00.000-05:00

Sorry I've been so MIA lately. It's partially been because I'm in a funk over Nepal, and partially because I've been buried with work.

The top two pictures were taken this morning while Lily waited in the driveway for Nana to pick her up to take her to the botanical gardens. When Kyle asked her where she was off to, she said, "kindergarten." I absolutely love that about our funny little girl-- she takes an unfamiliar word and modifies it to one she already knows. Or if she can't recall what the exact word for something is-- like the Dragon Boat Parade she was pretending to have with Kyle the other night-- she picks something that's close enough-- the Dragma Parade. Dragon Boat, Dragma, whatever, you know what I mean, now get behind me and march! Love that.

Or like when she and Freya decided to fix my aunt's doorbell, she rather appropriately renamed it the "dingbell" instead. I mean, it doesn't sound like a door, does it?

The bottom picture actually does relate to school-- Grammie made her a cover for her napmat from fabric that Lily picked out herself. Also rather appropriate, don't you think? Anyway-- you should see what Grammie came up with: it is not just a cover, but it has an attached pillow case, blanket and carrying strap. So now you know why I want to be like my mom and my mother-in-law when I grow up.

Lily starts pre-school on the 9th, and when her teacher called to introduce herself yesterday, Lily said, "Let me talk to her!" The teacher sounded like she was trying to get through her list so I wasn't sure she'd appreciate being interrupted by Lily's standard introductory questions, "What's you name? Do you have a dog?" Then again, she's a pre-school teacher by choice, so maybe she wouldn't have minded. In any case, I want her to like me so I let her get off the phone as soon as she shared all of the pertinent information, which is what I always wish for during phone calls (ok, maybe not when you call me, but on business calls I mean. Except for when it's a friend talking business. Oh you know what I mean.)

It's a little bittersweet entering this normally exciting time of football, pre-school, BSF, music class and MOPS with the weighty mantle of sadness about Little Brother. (To add insult to injury, a new client I'm working with has the same name that we had chosen for him. I know you're not trying to torment me, God, but really? There may be another little brother someday, but I doubt we'd ever consider using that name again. It was his. I now have an appreciation for why families who have suffered a miscarriage aren't necessarily comforted by the fact that they can just try again. I mean, yes, it is good that we can choose another adoption plan, but it's not just like opening a new carton of milk when the last one's gone. I doubt I'd be in the mood to date right after becoming a widow. No, our child isn't dead, but he's gone, and we are grieving.

We busied ourselves during the first few weeks writing letters and lobbying for the families in Nepal now and the families already matched. Now I'm done with that stage of better-busy-than-sad and have bowed out of following along-- it's too painful. We've received a couple of ideas from friends about other adoption programs (and by the way, we are overwhelmed with gratefulness at the concern that others have shown-- many of whom we've never even met) but at this point it seems to hard to start over. When I think about renewing fingerprints and homestudies and such-- I nearly wretch thinking about how the last time I killed myself to get it done so quickly it was all for nothing.

That said, even though we reject the notion that this "just wasn't meant to be," (no child was meant to be in an orphanage) God is able to use everything for His glory-- even evil, which is what we believe is behind this suspension that will keep children in orphanages. And if our very reason for existing is to glorify our Father, then instead of wishing these circumstances away, we will look for ways to glorify God in the midst of them. That's hard to do some days, so will you please continue to pray for us?

What Really Happened with Nepal-- my version of the FAQs

2010-08-09T21:57:00.002-05:00

I've been working on this post for awhile to shed some light on what is really happening not just in Nepal but in international adoption as a whole. I'm feeling soapboxy so this may get long, but bear with me. Here goes my version of FAQs about what the situation is.

Q: How are you guys doing?

A: Thanks for asking-- we are making it ok. We have certainly felt lifted up, so thank you for praying for us. When we broke the news to Lily she said, "Aww man! But I really wanted a little baby! {a total lie} A little tiny one, like a puppy or something!" That's more like it.

Q: But the State Department's press release made it sound like the situation was really sketchy in Nepal. Aren't you glad they shut down the program to prevent "illegitimate orphans" from being adopted?

A: If you read the State Department's press release and supporting FAQ's, you are led to believe that they stopped a horrible situation from getting worse. Upon further examination, it doesn't look like that is actually the case. Read on.

Q: In one of the poorest countries in the world, do they really have to fill orphanages by snatching kids while they're out for ice cream with their families?

A: Common sense would say no. Perhaps a more likely scenario is that a poor, third-world country like Nepal does not have the resources to create water tight documentation for each orphan, thus creating "illegitimate orphans."

Q: Why can't they just create the proper documentation like they do for orphans in China?

A: In Nepal, like China, it is illegal to abandon a child, so parents purposely do not leave a trail. But it is also illegal to relinquish a child, except under very narrow circumstances, so they can't freely come forward to give up a child that they cannot provide for. But unlike in China, desperate mothers don't leave their babies in public places to be found and turned over to orphanages-- they bring them to orphanages where a paper trail then has to be fabricated to protect the mother and the orphanage workers from calling attention to their "illegal" actions in relinquishing and taking in the child.

Q: But the State Department said that orphanage workers and other officials in Nepal don't cooperate with their investigations. Why would that be unless they were trying to hide something?

A: It is understandable, given the context, that an orphanage worker or policeman would not want to talk to an American official about paperwork that was fabricated in order to protect the mother and orphanage worker who were trying to provide a better life for the child (or perhaps even save the life of a child).

Q: So are the children placed for adoption actually illegitimate orphans?

A: These are children have been abandoned or relinquished by their birth mothers either because of extreme poverty or social issues (like not being married). These are not children who were illicitly bought from their parents to be sold to orphanages for a profit. Nor were they stolen under the cover of night from loving families who are fervently looking for them. Nepal runs "finding ads" like China does to prevent this from happening, so even if the children were stolen, the parents would know to look in finding ads.

Q: But what about the one case where the Embassy found that an adopted-child-to-be had parents who were looking for her?

A: The parents relinquished the child to an orphanage but didn't know she was being put up for adoption. This information was discovered during their investigation, and the child was thus not adopted.

Q: But doesn't this just show why investigations are necessary?

A: Yes.

Q: Describe the worst case scenario that was avoided because this particular adoption was stopped.

A: This child's parents relinquished her to an orphanage. The child was not stolen, sold, or otherwise illegally brought to the orphanage. It is not good that her parents did not know she would be adopted, but the worst case scenario that was avoided in this case is that she would have been brought into a loving, safe family in the United States rather than remain in an orphanage or with parents who could not care for her.

Q: Is the State Department holding Nepal to unfair standards by expecting water tight paperwork?

A: I'm not one to go blaming the US for pushing our way of doing things on other countries, but this might be one of those cases where it's true. We are expecting a third-world country with an ever-in-flux government to operate like our bloated bureaucracy where there's a form and a process for everything from cleaning bathrooms to ordering toilet paper.

Q: Who is really being punished by these standards not being met?

A: The innocent orphans of Nepal by sentencing them to a life in an orphanage, which though are often run by loving, dedicated workers, they can't provide the same care as a family.

Q: Why would the State Department announce the shut down just one week after they went through the trouble of letting families know that they were initiating a new program to conduct their investigations in a more efficient manner?

A: Surely they already had the wheels in motion for the shut down when they made this announcement, so it is not clear why they did this.

Q: Why didn't the State Department give any warning prior to the shut down like they did for other countries like Guatemala and Vietnam?

A: I don't know. When we asked the State Department why they chose this date, she said they had to pick a date, and that any date would seem arbitrary.

Q: Is there a date that would not seem arbitrary?

A: Yes-- the day after all 400ish currently approved families were matched with children.

Q: Did the State Department have any way of knowing how many families were approved and waiting?

A: Yes, they had just asked each agency to provide each waiting family's name and contact information (with the families' permission).

Q: Is it possible that the department was bowing to pressure from UNICEF?

A: They cite other countries' suspension of Nepali adoptions as a valid reason for their suspension, and other countries readily cite a recent UNICEF report as their main reason for pulling out.

Q: Has UNICEF been behind the suspension or slowing of adoptions in any other countries?

A: Yes, Haiti, Cambodia, Vietnam and Guatemala.

Q: Why would UNICEF try to halt international adoptions? Have they openly proclaimed that they are against international adoption?

A: They know that if they come out and say this then they will get all sorts of flack. So their official public position is that they support it in instances where all other avenues to keep a child in their own country, including foster care, have been exhausted. They claim that it is a priority of theirs to see children raised in families, just not their first priority. They don't place it ahead of preserving a child's right to remain in his country of origin.

Q: Do orphans care which country they are raised in?

A: Much research suggests that a child thrives best in a family, not a particular country.

Q: But wouldn't it be ideal for a child to have parents and stay in their home country?

A: Of course. But if this ideal can't be achieved (and in the countries we're talking about, it can't) the next best thing is to choose the more important priority-- having a family.

Q: But aren't you just a crazy orphan-loving nut? Why should we take your word for it?

A: Yes. You should seek the facts for yourself and read what the experts have to say. There is a Harvard law professor named Elizabeth Bartholet who is a champion of children's rights and has a great deal of knowledge on the topic. Read all of her stuff, but start with this paper, in which she properly positions international adoption as a human rights issue and also outlines UNICEF's unconscionable stance against it.

Q: Is she the only one who has seen their anti-adoption stance first hand?

A: No. If you google it, many references will come up. Some of what you'll see relates to Haiti. Much attention has been paid to Haiti's orphans since the earthquake, which has been both good and bad. On the good side: I'm the proud "aunt-to-be" of a 6-year-old Haitian orphan that our dear friends Billy and Cindy are in the process of adopting. Their sweet pea is in an orphanage that has long been supported by a local philanthropist, John Leininger, and he wrote a letter detailing his first-hand insight into UNICEF's dangerous and deceptive work to keep Haiti's orphans from being adopted.

I've copied the entire text of the letter below. It's long, but you won't be sorry that you opened your eyes to this situation.

I recently returned from almost three months in Haiti as a first responder. I helped bring in twelve teams, mainly medical and plane loads of medical supplies, tents etc. Seeing the plight of overwhelmed orphanages, my main thrust shifted to working with them. Having been involved in medical missions in Haiti for over two decades I found the direction taken by UNICEF and other aid agencies* to be counter to the well being of the children that they claim to serve. Rather than focusing on the dire needs of boys and girls left on their own in the streets and tarp cities, the international communities are spending their time, energy and resources on an agenda which attempts to coerce poor, often starving parents to take their children that they have sent to orphanages back to the squalor that they live in. . They pay them to take their children back, certainly realizing that the parents will not keep the child very long.(see " Separated Children in Haiti often not welcomed home," Fox News World)

Although UNICEF will try to downplay their opposition to adoptions and orphanages their influence is known and felt by orphanages involved with adoption and is articulated in their literature. UNICEF will suggest that they are not a government agency, but when Haitian social services (IBESR), which is in charge of adoptions and orphanages in Haiti came to our orphanage, UNICEF came with them every time. They have come to meetings of orphanage directors and have been very open in expressing their disdain for orphanages and adoptions in general. (see The Last Babylift, New Yorker and There's no Place Like Home, Newsweek)

For the past 23 years I have taken medical teams into rural parts of Haiti to treat people who are extremely poor and have no access to reasonable health care. Most every trip we are faced with a number of children who are severely malnourished and near death. Their parents often beg us to take their children to an orphanage where they will be fed, have health care available, even have a chance at being adopted, educated and loved. 55% of Haiti’s poor live on less than $1.25 per day and are unable to properly feed themselves, let alone their children. Because of the crowded conditions in orphanages before Haiti’s earthquake, we often literally would have to pick and chose which children we can take and which children must remain in these conditions. It is heart wrenching to return for a future clinic to hear that the children we didn’t take back died.

On my last clinic before the earthquake, I was faced with three month old Johnie. Due to his mother’s own malnutrition, she was no longer able to nurse him. She had been looking for baby formula but couldn’t find any in this rural area of Haiti. She said that she hadn’t fed him for nine days. She was so distraught and came to us for help, as there was no place else to go. She begged us to take Johnie back to the orphanage when he might survive and possibly even be adopted by a loving family and be taken from this situation where nearly 50% of children die by the age of five mainly from malnutrition and treatable disease. Fortunately we brought baby formula, but when we tried to feed Johnie we discovered that he was so near death that he no longer had a sucking reflex. Two women from our team took over at that point and started dripped formula down Johnie’s throat. It was three days until his strength returned enough that he could take a bottle by himself. We agreed to take Johnie back to the orphanage and he is now in the process of being adopted into a family in the US where he will be loved and cared for and have a chance at a far better life.

The next malnourished child that day was a three year old, 14 pound girl named Ginette who was severely malnourished but able to eat by herself. Through a ministry in her village, I was able to supply her with enough food for her whole family, every two weeks, in hopes that she would respond well to an ample supply of protein and other good food. Her mother was disappointed that we wouldn’t take Ginette back to the orphanage and give her daughter a chance at being adopted. Two weeks later, when the second supply of food was delivered to Ginette’s family, we found out that the little girl had died. This was Haiti before the earth quake.

The earthquake of January 12, 2010 only increased Haiti’s suffering and desperation, leaving over 300,000 dead, 250,000 homes and buildings destroyed, and 1.2 million homeless. Nearly half of the 1.2 million are children, many newly orphaned, who must now fend for themselves in tarp cities and on the streets. Without aid, these children will live a life of extreme poverty at best or a life of abuse as a child slave, a trafficked child or possibly living and dying on the streets as a beggar.(see Haitian Women Become Targets after Quake, LJ World)

Port-au-Prince is broken up into nine districts, or sections, each having a mayor or chief. While in Haiti, I spoke with a section chief, who told me that 200 to 250 unaccompanied 14-15 year old girls live in tarp cities in his section. According to him, they are being raped or are prostituting themselves to survive nightly. He claimed that one-third of them are already pregnant and that many have possibly contracted and are spreading HIV. No one is helping them. Where are the international organizations that are supposed to care about them? It seems that they are focused on finding the children that were taken by their parents or family to orphanages and trying to return them to these same parents or families that already have come to the conclusion that they cannot take care of them. (see Quake Survivors Becoming Rape Victims, LJ World)

As Port-au-Prince has nine sections, I would calculate that there are nearly 2,000 girls age 14 and 15 being raped and abused nightly in Port-au-Prince alone, and clearly thousands more younger and older than that. The chief also mentioned the severe conditions of unaccompanied young boys in the tarp cities. He tells me that they are now street children and are forming gangs to survive. He tells me areas of the city to avoid now so that I don’t get attacked by one of these gangs. No one is helping them either.

We found one of these boys, eight-year-old Jean Bernard, begging in the streets of Petionville. He had scabies head to toe, a scalp covered with sores, and other physical problems. When I asked if he would be willing to come to the orphanage to receive care from our nurses, he gladly agreed. We learned that Jean Bernard’s mother dropped him off in the streets a year ago when he was seven, and later died in the earthquake. Once he experienced the love and care that he found at the orphanage, he has not left to return to the streets and a gentle smile has returned to his face.

Jean Bernard also had a 13-year-old sister living in one of the tarp cities. We went to the tarp city to search for her, only to learn that a man had taken her away to become a restavek. Jean Bernard’s sister represents thousands of young boys and girls that will become child slaves, or restavecs. She will likely be physically and sexually abused, malnourished, and will live in extreme poverty for the rest of her life. Jean Bernard, on the other hand, is now being adopted into a family who will provide education, food, clothing, medical care and a future beyond anything that he can now imagine. (see Restavek, cnn.com)

When a mother finds that they and their child or children are starving, out of love for them, they typically resort to one of four options:

1) Place them in an orphanage that will care for them and possibly facilitate an adoption into a loving family as Johnie’s mother did.

2) Drop them off in the streets to beg for food, leading to malnutrition, sickness, and often death as in Jean Bernard’s case.

3) Sell them as a restavek to a wealthier Haitian guardian or family. Mainstream media estimates that there are up to 300,000 restaveks in Haiti, with the number escalating rapidly as destitute families give up their children and unaccompanied orphans are swept into servitude as Jean Bernard’s sister was.

4) Sell them to child traffickers. As reported on UNICEF’s web site: “As many as 2,000 children a year are trafficked to the Dominican Republic, often with their parents’ support”. Families give up their children to traffickers with full knowledge of what will happen to them, preferring this fate for their child over slow starvation and death.

Under current circumstances, the first option is pretty much shut down. Haitian orphanages are beyond capacity, having more than doubled their numbers since the earthquake, with children sleeping on the ground and floor and adoptions are made more difficult than ever due to UNICEF’s and others interference. That leaves options two, three or four for the mother to choose from. This tragedy will never make the news, as it is happening one street child, one restavek, and one trafficked little girl at a time.

Tragically, at a point in Haiti’s history when the international adoption process is most urgently needed, the international aid community refuses to support the adoption process. The UNICEF alternative to adoption is to return children to their impoverished parent or family, and to set up a welfare system for mothers who cannot care for their children. Given the poverty and lack of infrastructure in Haiti, this plan is highly impractical and unsustainable. Other than in the few big cities, there are no banks, no mail delivery and generally only walking trails between villages. I would also have to ask where the billions necessary for such a program would come from. Wouldn’t it also be reasonable to set this system up first before forcing the vulnerable children back to the poverty that they were sent away from by their parents?

Haiti has one of the ten most corrupt governments in the world. Until Haiti can sustain an industrial base, a working government, and a school system where more than fifty percent have any education and only 2% graduate from high school, the plan is absurd.

Regardless of the impression you have been given in the media, out of several thousand adoptions in Haiti not one has been found to be the result of child trafficking. Adoption requires a home study, FBI check, fingerprinting and generally costs in excess of ten thousand dollars and can take a year or two to complete. Why would a trafficker bother with that when they can bring a boat to a remote beach in Haiti and fill it with children and sail to wherever they choose, or cross the border into the Dominican Republic, which is more porous than the US border with Mexico.

This earthquake produced the worst tragedy in modern times and calls for a swift response. The adoption process should be allowed to move forward at a rapid pace. The world community should implement something like the Pedro Pan (Peter Pan) policy instituted during the Cuban crisis of 1960, when only a parent's signature was required for a destitute child to gain passage to the U.S. In the case of Haiti, this policy should include any other qualified and willing nations. This tragedy is far worse than what happened in Cuba. Removing children during times of disaster is not new. This occurred with Operation Babylift after the Vietnam War, where the American government quickly removed almost 3,000 children from Viet Nam during the fall of Saigon in 1975.

(see Operation Pedro Pan, Modern Latin American History)

Thirteen-year-old Rood is another example of an orphan who was given a chance. Found wandering around a tarp city by a medical mission, Rood lost his parents, grandparents, siblings, and left arm as his home fell during the earthquake. He was buried for three days in his dead mother’s arms, who saved his life by covering him as his home fell. When we found Rood, he had nothing and was starving. Our rotating nurses have since cared for his amputation and he will now receive a chance at life outside extreme poverty as a U.S. couple welcomes him into their home on an educational visa. Had we not found him and cared for his wound, he likely would have died of infection and sepsis. Although this would seem to be a case where he would be expedited through the visa process, the process is stalled because of Haitian law, under UNICEF’s pressure, which requires documents that don’t exist or are buried under the rubble of some government building. Rood continues to wait at the orphanage, and his American sponsors wait as well for a breakthrough in the process.

So why are these organizations not helping the children that they claim as their mission and instead are slowing or stopping adoptions that are in the best interest of these children? That is the most confusing and difficult question for me to answer. If you have read the articles via the links attached, you will hear phrases like “if children are adopted out, Haiti will lose its culture” and “adoption is Christian colonialism”. There are about 9.5 million people in Haiti and about 4 million in the US and Haiti hasn’t lost its culture. In fact, were it not for the 4 million Haitians in the US sending money to their relatives in Haiti, the conditions there would be far worse. It is true that most orphanages are Christian and most who adopt are Christian, but surely that’s not a reason to force these children to live so dreadfully. The only concept that makes a bit of sense to me is that we are dealing with a type of prejudice. It would be difficult and totally offensive for someone to suggest that a certain class of people not be allowed to come to the US because of their culture or color, but what if you said that they can’t come because it’s better for them to stay, so their country doesn’t lose its culture, because it’s a new form of colonialization by Christians. That could make the process politically correct and seem humanitarian.

My plea to UNICEF and the other organizations supporting their policies is to work together helping the children in the most dire need, be it the unaccompanied boy or girl in the tent cities being raped and forced to beg, working together to stop the trafficking of children across the border to the Dominican Republic, taking restivec children from their masters and taking them to an orphanage where they can be cared for, and helping orphanages expedite these vulnerable children through the adoption process. (see CBS News video)

UNICEF claims that it is working to make Haiti “fit for children”. I hope that they succeed, but until they do, it is clear that the best interest of the displaced child to get them out of Haiti as fast as possible to loving homes elsewhere.

Dr. John Leininger
Founder and President Emeritus, Harvest International, Inc.

*Five NGO’s in the child protection cluster of UN/UNICEF:
-International Committee of the Red Cross
-Save the Children
-International Rescue Mission-
World Vision
-Heartland Alliance

Q: Is anyone still reading?

A: Only my parents.

Q: But what is your true motivation? Don't you just want your son from Nepal?

A: Three years ago I cared about orphans as much as the next girl, but what I really cared about was having a baby. After becoming a mother to a former orphan, and after some serious molding of my heart by Jesus, my motivation has changed. I want an end to the orphan crisis. I want more Christians' eyes to be opened to the plight of the 143 million fatherless in the world, and the dark forces that are working to ensure that they remain so. I want more families to experience the unfailing love of Christ through the eyes of a former orphan who now has their last name.

Q: Well, aren't you a pious one.

A: No! I am a selfish jerk who daily asks Jesus to change my heart to be more like His. I am not worthy of anything but self-centeredness on my own. But you already know that because I'm your daughter. (Remember, my parents are the only ones still reading.)

Q: Now what do we do?

A: Keep praying. Do something to support orphans and adoptive families. Stop supporting UNICEF and their member organizations. Tell them what you think about their stance on international adoption. Pray for us. Pray for child who would have been our son in Nepal. Pray for all of the orphans in Nepal.

I Thessalonians 5:17: Pray without ceasing.

Bad News from Nepal - It's Over

2010-08-06T13:45:00.000-05:00

Not from Nepal, anyway.

We received the news this morning and we feel like we've been punched in the gut. The worst part is, we had our hopes up this week because our agency received two referrals and we thought one of them might be ours. But despite those renewed hopes, we had previously prepared ourselves for the reality that this might happen, as other countries had also shut down Nepali adoptions for their countries.

So where does this leave us?

$12,000 poorer, red-eyed and quite honestly-- rather ticked off. There are hundreds of orphans in Nepal who have likely already been matched with families who are now destined to remain orphans in one of the poorest countries in the world. All the while nurseries in homes all across America that were meant for them sit empty, their parents heartbroken that the child they thought would one day fill it will not become theirs.

This, however, does not leave us questioning God.

Well, maybe I asked Him why He let our hopes be raised this week, knowing they'd be shortly dashed.

And perhaps I asked Him why three families who registered their paperwork after us got referrals right before the cut-off.

But I don't question His sovereignty or goodness or justice. I don't question His love for us or for the boy who was to be our son. I don't question His plan for our family.

I trust Him even if we are to remain a family of three forever.

And I thank Him for the provision of work for me to keep me distracted and to refill the adoption fund that will now be repurposed somehow for another orphan's ransome, either ours or someone else's. And perhaps some of it will be repurposed for a conciliatory beach vacay-- mama needs some salt water to help heal these wounds. And perhaps a pina colada.

Right now, I also need to hug my baby girl, who mercifully has been at her Nana and Nanu's so she hasn't had to see me cry all morning. It's ok that she has seen my parents cry over it, she's used to the old people acting ridiculously :)

Please join us in praying for the orphans of Nepal who just lost the hope of a family, and for wisdom for us in determining if this closed door is really an open door to something else.

Monkey

2010-07-30T11:05:00.000-05:00

We took the kids to the park by Auntie Fray's house the other night and my little monkey was in the mood to smile for the camera. Can you believe how grown up she is getting?

She and I arrived at the park a little later than the others due to a little fit by Her Highness as baby Ethan was being strapped into his jogging stroller. Lily, who has developed a sudden case of Stroller Envy (she wanted to "borrow" Aisling's stroller the whole time she was here), immediately asked if she could ride in Ethan's sweet ride. "Um, he doesn't know how to walk yet, so the answer is no," I replied. "But his mom can just carry him!" She had it all figured out. Auntie Kelly, who is 8 months pregnant nicely informed Lily that that would not work, since she wasn't coming to the park. "Then his dad can carry him!"

You gotta hand it to her for her problem-solving capabilities. She managed to calm down with the distracting help of some toy cars, and a few minutes later Grayson trudged downstairs and said he needed an escort to the park. Lily happily replied, "Let's go! I can just walk!" Sweet Grayson, the miracle cure.

Lily the Diving Cheerleader

2010-07-29T11:05:00.000-05:00

On Sunday we went to my cousin PJ's graduation party, and it was the first day in a long time that Lily didn't have a nap. She kept herself awake by becoming the official diving cheerleader for PJ, his brother and my godson Nate, and their rather daring and athletic friends. She whooped and hollered and giggled and occassionally fell into a little sleep-deprived trance while she waited for the next diver.

Peeps

2010-07-29T10:44:00.000-05:00

Sierra and Lily

Tanner, Grayson and Lily

Teet, Lily and a gorgeous arugula and spinach salad

Vince and Mia with their new "tattoos"

Hailey was such a good sport despite her ill-tempered boat-mate

It's why we come. Sure, the scenery and weather are well worth the trip, but really the reason we make the voyage to the motherland every year is to love on (and be loved by) our Left Coast people. As I uploaded these photos it struck me that I didn't stop talking long enough to take pictures of everyone we've spent time with so far, but that just proves how much fun we've had catching up with everyone. Almost every single person we've seen comments on how tall Lily has gotten since last summer, and she asks me to tell every single person how she bumped her head last week (in a game of chase with her dad). Not sure what that's about, but it seems to have replaced "What's you dog's name?" as her ice breaker of choice.

Highlights for Lily this week have been playing with friends and cousins, and we've learned that she's not a super big fan of the paddle boats on El Estero. Who knew that a 3 foot deep dirty lake in the middle of town could strike such fear in the heart of a child.

It's been a great week so far, and we are excited to go pick up Kyle at the airport this morning. As predicted, he couldn't stand being away from his favorite peeps. Stay tuned for more pictures of our adventures!

"I would adopt but my husband isn't on board"

2010-07-21T12:56:00.000-05:00

This is an excuse that really doesn't feel like an excuse to the person saying it. Sometimes it's the wife, but more often it's the husband. Either way, in my vast five years of adoption experience nearly 100% of adoptions start with just one spouse (and often because of a sibling-- more on that later).

It can be wildly frustrating for a woman who has clearly felt the call to adopt (more on "calls" in another post) to have a husband who has stone-walled the idea. The temptation to drag him into it often wins out over patiently and quietly praying for God to change his heart. The temptation to wallow in feeling sorry for herself for being married to a cold-hearted ogre is equally hard to resist, but clearly is not an effective way to change his mind. And the enemy would be very happy for said wife to simply give up, knowing that her husband's "final decision" is way too big for God to do anything about.

Ya'll. If I had a dollar for every "final decision" that was overturned, I could pay cash for Little Man's remaining adoption expenses. I mean to tell you-- I have heard the words myself out of husband's mouths-- "No more kids. No way, no how. Not going to do it. Please don't bring it up again." And you know I love for more kids to come home, but sisters, I believed this man when he said no more. (And you know I was too scared to even bring it up again, even to the wife for fear he would somehow find out!) But his faithful wife is not a scaredy cat like me-- she honored her husband's request to not bring it up again-- but he didn't say to whom, so she didn't give up praying to her Great Big God and thus she was not alltogether surprised-- ok, maybe just a little- when her Great Big God changed the heart of her man who had made. up. his. mind. And then, miraculously, mere months later, said husband was getting on plane to meet his daughter. And he didn't just change his mind and say, "I guess it's ok..." This formerly not-super-involved-in-the-minutae-of-adoption dad was CALLING THE SOCIAL WORKER to get a home study. So when I say this was a miracle, I am not exaggerating (which I'll admit I'm prone to doing). And I'm also not exaggerating when I tell you what a big deal this little girl's adoption is. She is not a baby. She is living in a pretty horrendous situation. The enemy is prowling around her orphanage like you would not believe. She probably would have little hope of being adopted if not for my faithful friend's continual intercession and her Great Big God's response to her desperate prayers.

So I ask you-- how big is your god? Has He answered your prayers before? Do you have any reason to doubt His heart for orphans? Any reason to doubt that He wants a loving home for your yet-to-be-known-by-you child? Then what are you waiting for? Get on your knees and ask your Great Big God to change the heart of your sweet husband to be more like the heart of His Father. He can do it. He will do it.

He did it for us too. I was beyond ready to start our second adoption but Kyle kept vetoing my choices for avenues by which to adopt. Foster? No. Africa? No. Korea? Too fat. China? Too sick. "Lord! Help!" I kept praying, "I know you want this for our family, but seriously with the vetoes-- get ahold of that man!" I knew Kyle was as dedicated to adoption as I was, so I just kept praying, "Lord, he may be in charge of me, but you are in charge of Him. Reveal your plans for our family to Kyle so he can reveal them to me. Because Mama is ready to do some paperwork!" And...of course He answered my prayers (why am I surprised every time?) When I brought up Nepal to Kyle, along with my complete business case for why it was a good fit for us-- super poor country in Asia (where Kyle kept saying he felt led)-- a little light went on in Kyle's eyes. Yes, yes, that was it! Our son is in Nepal. My great big God answered my prayers according to His perfect timing, and used my husband to direct us where He wants us to go. And there's no other place I'd rather be!

To read another post on this subject, go visit the amazing mother of many at A Place Called Simplicity.

Feeling Super Famous

2010-07-21T12:22:00.000-05:00

A famous author left a comment on my food blog!! Go check it out!! Normally any temporary brush with fame is related to my super famous brother Kevin, but this time it's thanks to the power of keyword searches on the Internet. Yay for technology!

Other Excuses and an iPad

2010-07-20T14:26:00.000-05:00

There are so many options for fulfilling James 1:27. If money is your excuse for adopting, see my last post (below).

If money is not your issue, then will you consider giving $5, $10, $25 or however much you can to help my friend Lori's family bring home their newest family member, an older boy from China (looking on as another girl from his orphanage was adopted in the picture above-- now if that doesn't rip your heart out...). Older orphans in the world have quite a plight, and older boys from China are especially hard to place. And do you know what happens if they turn 14 in an orphanage? They forever lose their chance at having parents. NOT ok!

Many people have many reasons for not adopting older children. But this family has trusted God with their reasons and this precious boy will be their second older child from China. If you want to cry, check out Lori's blog posts from their trip to bring home Macy, almost 14, from China last year. It prompted Kyle and I to look into an older child adoption while we wait for Numero Dos from Nepal, but alas, my 20 year old cancer diagnosis keeps us from adopting from China again. This should not be considered an announcement, but I wouldn't be surprised if our 3rd child is an older child from another country.

Oh, and did I mention that Lori is giving away an iPad? I mean, I am an avowed Apple hater, but now that I'm working from home it would not suck to have that gadget. So.... hop on over to her blog to be blessed by their family's story AND see how you can get in on the iPad action while you're at it.

What excuse should I cover next? "If we were younger we would totally adopt?" or "We think adoption is wonderful! How great that your family has been called to it." Which one do you hear more often?

"If we had the money we would totally adopt"

2010-07-17T07:33:00.000-05:00

Really?

What if I told you that you don't have to have the money?

We sure didn't. And we sure don't. But we are moving forward in obedience, knowing that to the One in charge of the universe, $25,000, especially in small increments over the course of a 1-3 year adoption process, is no big deal. From the time we applied to adopt Lily until we brought her home, the cost ended up being about $600 per month. That is roughly the same that we spent on our two cars during that time. Or on cable, cell phones and eating out. Puts it in perspective. We didn't have the entire sum when we applied, but we knew we would do whatever it took to bring a child home, and He blessed us in ways that we could not have foreseen in order to make every adoption payment that was due. He has always provided for our every need-- not always our wants (thankfully)-- and we are trusting Him to provide every dollar needed to bring home our next child.

Do you trust God that much? Because I really didn't at first, not until I started admitting to Him that I didn't, and started asking Him to change that. "Lord, teach me how to trust you as my only true provider. Lord, teach me how to trust you. Lord, teach me how to trust you." The end to that story shouldn't be a huge surprise-- He answered my prayers and has been teaching me how to trust Him alone-- not a paycheck, not the economy, not our abilities-- to provide for our family's every need.

Do you trust God as your sole provider? If you don't, and money truly is your only obstacle to adoption, then I urge you to start praying for God to show you how to trust Him. Ask Him to rain down money for an adoption in a way that only He could get the glory for. I have seen it happen more times in more families than I could ever recall.

God is faithful always. He promised that He will answer our prayers when we pray in accordance with His will. It is His will that we trust Him completely. It is His will that we see Him as our true provider. And it is His will that the lonely be set in families, that orphans be cared for.

If you agree with all of that, and know that God desires for orphans to be placed into families, and that you can trust Him as your provider, then perhaps the issue is that you view money as yours rather than His? Maybe money is something you see as an avenue to freedom or comfort? It's a common sin in these comfortable times, one I've been guilty of most of my life and still struggle with. Although we place a great deal of value on our comfort, Jesus is far more concerned with our obedience than our comfort. He would prefer that I spend less money on things that make my life more comfortable and convenient-- the housecleaner, the drive through, a vacation-- and more of it bringing glory to His Father by obeying His command to look after orphans. He doesn't desire poverty-- don't misunderstand-- what He desires is for me to view money as His, which will cause me to use it in a way that primarily serves to bring Him glory, not make my life easier or more comfortable.

If money is not your particular excuse for not caring for orphans, then consider giving to Show Hope or Half the Sky to help other families and organizations whose only "but" is money. We'll get to your excuse in another post, so stay tuned... :)

Don't Worry About my Gingerbread Frinkles

2010-07-05T17:19:00.000-05:00

Lily hung out with my mom while I did some work this afternoon, and when my mom had the audacity to ask how her lunch was going, Lily replied, "Don't worry about my sandwich, ok?" My mom insisted that there wasn't a hint of disrespect, merely an intent to inform that my mom's time would be better spent worrying about something other than Lily's sandwich. Uh huh.

Did you ever want something ridiculous when you were a kid? Like a cast or braces? Well, Lily wants wrinkles on her forehead. She loves to say, "Go like this {grimace} so I can see your frinkles." Then she proceeds to rake her fingers across them, which feels awesome. As if the reminder that I'm old enough to have frinkles doesn't feel awesome enough.

Lastly, Lily has a penchant for winter clothes. When sent to get dressed on her own, she invariably comes out in something suitable for Minnesota in February. Or Monterey in July, but almost never South Texas in July. And yes, she has to HUNT for these clothes-- they are put away either in another room's closet or dresser. This picture was taken 5 minutes ago when I sent her up to get dressed for a walk to the park. (Note the gingerbread men on her pants.) In case you're wondering, it is 95 degrees today, with a heat index of 783 swamp degrees Fahrenheit. Off to the park we go, gingerbread men and all...

Wallermelons

2010-06-27T19:56:00.000-05:00

We got to the farm on Friday so Kyle could help put up hay. Or at least that's what we're telling people. It's really so we can eat our way through Grandy's beautiful watermelons, or "wallermelons" as Lily would say.

We heard some distressing barks from the dogs while we were playing outside on Friday, and when they made their way home, we could very easily smell who had distressed them. Gus apparently didn't get out of the skunk's way fast enough, but mercifully Hazel was smarter. Lily was VERY interested in what the skunk had done to her dear Gus, and kept asking, "What did Gus turn into?" Someone must have said that the dogs got into some skunk, and she thought we were saying that Gus turned into a skunk. She kept asking over and over again, clearly not liking the implications of her beloved hound dog suddenly becoming a stinky rodent.

Then last night we went down to the Walker place where Kyle was cutting hay and Kyle asked George to show him where a particular tree stump was so he could watch for it. George asked Lily if she wanted to ride with him to look for the stump and her eyes got really wide. She thought they were going to look for the rodent that Gus had turned into!

This morning at church we realized that Lily has never been in big church for communion. She was SO interested in my cracker, and I had to keep (quietly of course) explaining why she couldn't have it yet. Since she couldn't eat it, she wanted to get a good wiff to see what she was missing, and I'm telling you-- the blessed bread was INSIDE the girl's nostril. So hard to keep focused on the meaning of Christ's body being sacrificed for my sin when the Chinese kid on your lap has the wafer half-way up her nose.

As if that wasn't embarassing enough to my poor mother-in-law....

When we got to the next element, she was even more delighted to see that tiny little cup filled with dark liquid and I had to fight her off me. She was more than a little miffed that not only would I not let her drink it, but I wouldn't let her hold it (I was wearing a white shirt that I didn't want to dye purple). It seemed like it was to get back at me, but I know it was purely innocent when she disrupted the Southern Baptist silence with a question that I'm sure has never been asked in that sanctuary, "Is that beard?"

I'm fairly certain we do something to embarrass my in-laws every time we go to church with them, but I'm pretty sure this tops the list...

Chengdu is the East Texas of China

2010-06-21T09:49:00.000-05:00

Marlow translating some Lily-isms.

I have long made fun of my East Texas family members for the words they use in place of another perhaps more accurate or appropriate word. For awhile I thought it was just them, and then I realized it was an affliction common to the region from whence they came. For instance, I had Miranda Lambert, who also hails from East Texas, in my car a few months ago (no lie) and I even asked her if she reguarly used the East Texas-isms that my people did, and she confirmed that you do in fact want to nip that chester drawers in the butt before it tumps over and you end up in a hearst. (If you are thoroughly confused about why that sentence is funny... you might be from East Texas).

So, imagine my delight at our sovereign Lord's sense of humor, when He afflicted my CHINESE child with the very same thing. Instead of being just plain funny, the words she substitutes are incredibly cute. Here are some of the latest:

Liplash= Whiplash (Kyle's favorite rodeo attraction, the monkey that rides a dog)

That fast-growing skinny tree that pandas eat? Shampoo.

Next what? = guess what

Pocorns = acorns

When a mosquito bite starts to fade away, she says it's running away.

That's all for this week's episode of "You might be from East Texas if...." Join us again next week live on location when we'll discuss growing peas and watermelon.

Three Words: Sass, Sass, Sass

2010-06-14T22:19:00.000-05:00

Lily with sweet (not sassy) Libby the other night. They had so much fun!

Today Lily spent a few hours at my parents' so I could get some work done (yep, I'm working!) and she was, according to my mom, perfect until naptime. See, Lily knows certain procrastination attempts will work with her beloved Nana, and she uses them liberally. Some of the ones she used today were, "I can't sleep until I eat some blueberries," "I want to sleep with the kitty," "the workermans are too loud" and the old standby, "I have to go potty. Again." Finally after 45 minutes Nana gave up, texted me and told Lily she wasn't too happy with her, to which Lily gave a backward glance to my dad and said, "Nanu's happy...." As in, "This is clearly your problem. Not mine."

Mere moments later, my mom was (happily) dropping her off and Lily was eager to walk her out (her new favorite thing to do with guests which is not altogether the most polite thing for a kid to say in front of guests). She began to roll her shopping cart toward the garage and I said, "Park it, sister, we are walking her out, not shopping her out." Without skipping a beat she said, "I'll shop you out." I know I know I know I need to nip this in the bud less she become a disrespectful sass, but dang, her quick wit makes me proud.

This last funny from today isn't sassy, but I'll tell you anyway before it is long gone from my brain. We went to see Marlow and Rhys's swim meet tonight, and as we pulled up Lily realized there were two separate playgrounds and said, "How cool is that?" That's what we say about you every day, darlin'!

The Andersens Come to Town

2010-06-12T11:22:00.000-05:00

What do you get when you combine six sassy girls, two silly boys, one sweet toddler and three water adventures? A Harrell-Andersen-Breedlove Memorial Day Extravaganza! We spent Saturday on the Guadalupe River, Sunday at my mom's pool then Sea World, and Monday having a make-up lesson with Aunt Brandi.

All of the kids loved Sea World, and it wasn't as brutal on the adults as any of us expected, especially when the sun went down. We took the girls on their first ever log ride, splashed around the water park and watched Shamu do his best impression of me in a pool. We even got to see a baby killer whale which was pretty cute. Lily thought she was hot stuff prancing around with Aunt Brandi and Bebe and the big girls. Lily's prize for making it through the traumatic last hill on the "log boat" was a bowl of rainbow Dippin Dots that Uncle Kristian had waiting for her. You can see from the picture that the trauma was miraculously washed away by the frozen little balls of love.

Unfortunately I didn't bring my camera down to the river so I don't have any pictures of the beautiful spot that the Joneses let us break into in their neighborhood. There were three little beach spots for us to play at, and though the Andersen kids dove right in, Lily was tired, cranky and hesitant about getting in the water until the very end (figures). It was a classic Hill Country summer Saturday, and we loved the fresh air, cool water and shade.

Lily tried to delay their departure on Monday morning by tricking Aunt Brandi into putting "make-ups" on her. Talk about thinking she was hot stuff- she walked around with half-puckered lips and fluttered her eye lashes all morning. She looked beautiful, in a quasi-disturbing Toddlers and Tiaras kind of way, and from now until she's 25 make ups will be reserved for visits with Aunt Brandi.

Thanks for coming Andersen clan and Bromli!!

My New Food Blog

2010-05-14T18:48:00.000-05:00

Check out what I've been doing in my free time: One Hungry Mother is my new food/cooking blog. I just added the recipe for the most delicious cookies that I thought you could only find in stores... lace cookies!

A Day in the Life

2010-05-13T08:10:00.000-05:00

Here are a couple of pictures of Lily working in her grocery store (you can't see it in this pic but her cash register is on the couch.) She's scanning a wand that her dad ordered. Please also note the Lightening NaQueen cell phone in her pocket.

"Clean up on aisle 6"

While doing a puzzle with Lily, I yelled a question to Kyle who was in the other room. Lily looked down her glasses at me (I mean, if she wore them that's what she would have been doing) and said, "If you're going to scream, we aren't going to do this puzzle. Ok?"

I have been trying to play rhyming games with Lily to teach her how to rhyme and she is so not into it. She has not once made a rhyme, so I figured she either doesn't get it yet, or she just isn't interested yet. Whatever. But the other night she and Kyle were singing songs and she said, "Ring around the rosies, I love roly polies." Sooooo, apparently she does in fact, know how to rhyme, she just doesn't want me to know it. Uh huh, I know I have this coming to me.

She and Kyle were playing betend the other night and he was trying to wrap her up in a blanket, and he said, "You're a little baby," and she immediately stopped playing, stuck her finger in his face and in her best stern mom voice said, "We do not call names."

Lily went to Rhys and Danny's baseball game the other night with Tahra, and when I asked her what she ate, she said Marlow gave her a blue flushie. Yummo.

Lily and Blake are really into winning. You know, the typical, "beat you to the car" kind of kid games. Someone always gets proclaimed the winner, and the other the loser. (More on why we don't discourage the concept of winning in our house later). We were driving with my mom one day and Lily informed me that I had "loosed" something she was playing with me so I said, "Lily, it's 'you lost,' not 'you loosed.'" She raised her eyebrows, cocked her head a bit and said, "You lost and you loosed.

That's my girl!

Blake is 3?

2010-05-03T09:24:00.000-05:00

I got the camera out for this picture because they looked so cute snuggling on the couch together early one morning watching cartoons. Since the camera is the international signal to quit doing whatever you were doing that prompted its appearance, they ceased to sit and snuggle and instead Blake started trying to look as miserable as possible (one of his favorite tricks). That of course tickled Lily to death, so she giggled while he growled at me. And this, my friends, is why I love my job! Who wants a paycheck when you can get paid in sweet faces, growls and giggles? There were plenty of people who growled at me when I worked for a paycheck, but I can assure you they were never this endearing.

Lily and Blake continue to have a love/hate relationship. Ok, maybe hate is too strong of a word for 3 year olds. How about love/not-so-much relationship. For instance, last night Blake came over with Danny and Rhys for something, and when Lily saw Blake she got SO excited because she wasn't expecting him. As soon as Blake saw her getting excited, he said, "I am not coming to your house, I'm just with my dad." What he meant was, I'm not here because I wanted to see you, I just wanted to be with the tree from which I did not fall from." (Love you, bro!) Ten minutes later they were happily playing together.

Another recent development in their relationship is that they talk on the phone. One evening while Lily sat with me as I got some work done, she announced that she wanted to call Blake. She then proceeded to help herself to my cell phone, press the speed dial number for Blake's house, have a brief conversation with her aunt, and then her cousin. I sat there dumbfounded. I had no idea how she knew how to call their house, nor did I expect her to be calling her friends at 3 years old, completely unassisted. Even funnier was that Tahra and Blake both acted like it was totally normal. Tahra later told me that Blake walked off and took the call in the office.

It took me about a week to figure out how she knew which speed dial to press for Blake but I finally figured it out in a rare moment of mental clarity and memory recall. I taught her months ago how to call her dad by pressing 2. One day while playing with my phone she said, "Blake is 3?" I thought she was checking on his age since he never misses an opportunity to tell her that he's about to be 4, thus leaving her in the dust at the mere and meek and unfortunate age of 3. But now I know that she was asking for his speed dial assignment, and it happens to be 3. Mystery solved. Now I just have the cell phone obsession to address...

Obligatory Bluebonnet Pictures

2010-04-09T17:32:00.004-05:00

I'm not sure if this happens all over Texas, but in San Antonio in the Spring all young children (is it old ones too?) are dragged into fields of blue bonnets to be photographed. If you happen to find yourself in a group of mothers this time of year, you will hear things like, "I saw some next to such-and-such church" or "I found the cutest outfits at Overpriced Boutique for Johnny and Janey for our bluebonnet pictures this year." It's quite funny and more than a little ridiculous to overhear unless you too have been on the lookout for a place other than the side of a freeway that has enough bluebonnets to take cute spring pictures of your rather cute kid. We lucked out last year and happened upon a huge field of them as we were leaving the L-town Easter debacle, I mean extravaganza, and we got some great shots.

This year I was sure we'd find some there again... except the only place they had bloomed was in the town cemetery! Um, a little weird. So I was thrilled to find out that over the days we'd been holed up at the farm, a little patch of bluebonnets had bloomed by Uncle Paul's place, so we stopped for some pics on our way out of town. Unfortunately it wasn't a shower day for me so we couldn't get any cute Mom-and-Lil's like we did last year. Oh well, we all know what I look like.

Anyway, enjoy this year's installment of The Bluebonnet Pictures.

Oh, btw, if you aren't on facebook and don't follow our Nepal blog, there has been some movement there lately, so it is looking slightly more likely that Lily will have a little brother after all. Maybe in time for next year's bluebonnets? Your guess is as good as mine...

Harrell Cattle LLC in Action

2010-04-04T14:23:00.002-05:00

Enjoy this little glimpse into the cowboying that went on this weekend. I knew Kyle was a heck of a cowboy but apparently Danny is too-- who knew!

Easter Lily

2010-04-04T12:08:00.003-05:00

We will never forget our first Easter with Lily, two years ago in Guangzhou, China. Being a parent sure gave new meaning to Easter! What a far cry it was to celebrate Easter in East Texas with the Edwards clan and my family yesterday. Thankfully we did it a day early-- it was sunny and gorgeous yesterday and today is wet and nasty. The kids hunted Easter eggs and the babies enjoyed a ride in the wagon courtesy of their rickshaw driver big cousin :) Lunch, mostly courtesy of Phyllis and Aunt Beth, was DELICIOUS! Everyone especially loved Beth's chicken and dumplings and Phyllis' chicken dressing, although I think the cooks were shocked at how little leftovers remain after lunch with the Canadys! So much for Operation Summer Vacay...

This morning we packed up my fam and sadly sent them back to San Antonio. Apparently there's school tomorrow or something. Lily said, "I don't want the kids to leave!" Isabel tried to hide as the cars were being packed... she is a country girl at heart. We sure loved having you guys here!

Don't you love this pic of Lily pulling cousins Piper and Hudson in their wagon? Their moms are twin sisters, and like Blake and Lily, they're only a few months apart. They already love each other to pieces, and we know what fun lies in store for them as they grow up together!

City Mouse, Country Mouse

2010-04-03T16:33:00.009-05:00

What's so funny, Ma? You think I'm joking that they will have rocking chairs like this at the home we put you guys in?

While I was taking these pictures I said, "Whatcha doing, Lily?" and without looking up she said, "working." Hellllooooo.

Country dog, city dogs.

He's all mine, ladies, all mine.

Lily's favorite game

The country food was a big hit with the Canady kids. Why else would your fat aunt tolerate the bugs and the humidity?

Blakey loved baby Bolton!

And what Blakey loves, Lily loves.

Lily was so proud to show off the farm to her city cousins this weekend. I'm pretty sure Grammie and Grandy will never be the same after having 11 extra people under their roof, but at least it erased any regret that may have remained about only having one child. And perhaps after this weekend they won't pressure us into have more grandchildren. All kidding aside, we've all loved soaking up spring's first warmth together.

Isabel has enjoyed every second with the animals and Blake has enjoyed every piece of dirt that he's encountered. But perhaps best of all, my dad has LOVED betending that he's a partner in George Harrell Construction for the weekend, working the saw mill, driving tractors and doing who knows what else the menfolk do around here. And George has loved having another husband around who needs more assistance indoors than he does. You're welcome. Danny thought he was just going to 'play' country this weekend but he got put to work too. That's how the Harrells roll, bro, sorry. Rhys has logged more hours on his bike this weekend than he has in all of 2010, and Marlow has worn out the two-wheeler she just learned to ride last weekend. She even rode it alongside me on a walk/jog (Operation Summer Vacay), and other than a couple of run-ins with some sandy patches of road, she did great. Gus even tagged along on that walk and stayed with us the whole time. He and Hazel are a lot better at sticking closer to home on this trip. That makes for much happier mamas and grandmamas.

Today we had Easter with the Edwards clan... I'll post those pics next.

Recent Choice Outfits

2010-03-22T10:38:00.003-05:00

Instead of hogging all the amusement for myself, I thought I'd share some of Lily's latest fashion doozies with you.

In case you can't tell, that would be candy corn all over the leggings, and the shirt says, "Nashville Star." Supa Sta! And yes, that's one Hello Kitty sock and one Minnie Mouse.

She plucked this shirt right out of the hand-me-down box because it looks like a boy shirt, and it has a "Mewican" flag on it. At least my little fashion trainwreck is a patriot.

Yes those are the purple Husky pants, and yes that's a black cat on the orange shirt.

Nashville Star, take 2, plus green ribbit bermudas and orange flip flops, stolen from Blake.

Um, yes, those would be size 2 stripey hot pants with a black church shirt... regular bike riding gear.

Second Gotcha-versary!

2010-03-17T16:33:00.003-05:00

I'm sure you will agree with me that even with the green tinge in the top picture, the St. Patrick's Day 2010 pictures are much easier to look at than the St. Patrick's Day 2008 pics. We knew then that Lily was grieving but it wasn't until we knew what a contented Lily was like that we truly understood how sad and scared she must have been that day.

Oh, how that breaks my heart.

But that's not the end of the story, thanks be to God. How awesome is redemption!? Only God can take the tears of a grieving orphan and turn them into the joyous laughter of a care-free three-year-old. And only God can make joyous parents out of the barren and bitter. God didn't make Lily an orphan or close my womb but He doesn't waste anything caused by the sin of this fallen world. Jesus was sent to bind up the brokenhearted.. and provide for those who grieve, a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of gladness unstead of mourning and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair (from Isaiah 61:1-3). Thank you Lord!

Trip down memory lane

2010-03-13T16:45:00.003-06:00

I realized this morning that we arrived in China two years ago today, so I headed back to the archives to read my post from that day (also pasted below). I guess I shouldn't be surprised that I was able to come up with that long of a post just about the flight there. I have problems, I know. I was, well, we were so very excited. It was all so surreal that something we thought was never going to happen was actually happening. It was so hard to contain my joy that I even blogged about airplane food.

I treasure the memories of our trip of a lifetime and hope you will also get a little giggle and maybe even teary like I did as I re-read this post.

Well, after 31 hours of travel we finally made it to Beijing. We were greeted by our guide, Rosa, who’s a doll, and Sherry, the guide for the other half of our group. We arrived at our hotel, which is sort of like a middle-of-the-road Marriott, at about 11pm. Rosa checked us in, we changed some money at the front desk to buy bottled water, and went to bed. The sleep last night was sort of like it was on the plane - a series of naps. Every time I woke up I prayed it was morning already, and this last time I figured it was close enough and got up to write this in the bathroom since Kyle is still sleeping. It’s about 6am, and we meet the group in the lobby at 9 to tour Tiananmen Square, the Forbidden City and Hutong.

Yesterday - or should I say the last two days - wasn’t as bad as I thought it was going to be. After sleeping only 4 hours the night before we left, we were all very tired even getting on our first of 4 planes, but we didn’t sleep until the flight to SFO. By the time we got on the plane for Tokyo, we were all ready for another nap. I think I slept about 4 hours on that flight and felt pretty human when we got to Tokyo. I kept singing “Old Tokyo” in my head, a song my brother Kevin made up when he was about 5. There’s only 2 lines, so I started driving myself crazy after a while, but it was fun to remember. Have him sing it for you next time you see him.

One of the most fun things about being in a foreign country to me is seeing how they translate English on signs and things. Kyle and I were kind of hungry for a snack when we got off the plane so we went to the little food court/cafeteria that was near our gate. We ordered fried squid which was just the heads, and it was yummy. Instead of a mayonnaise-based sauce, they served it with lemon. Do you think that’s why we are fat and they aren’t? Anyway, it was good, and Kyle managed to fit in a chopsticks lesson with Phyllis while we sat there. So the sign-- there was a No Smoking sign in the seating area, and at the bottom it said “There is a place for smokers in the depths.” While I hate cigarette smoke as much as the next Californian, I am glad to know they meant the back of the restaurant.

I’ll keep up the food theme and tell you about the other meals we had-- which was every 3-4 hours for 30 hours, btw. The food on the plane started out pretty good but then got not so much. They gave Kyle and I the choice of Western or Japanese, and we chose Japanese. The first meal had all sorts of little servings of sushi, Japanese pickles and other fun little appetizery things to start with. The main dish was sea bass cooked in egg whites (?) and was also delicious. Back in the cheap seats, Phyllis had teriyaki chicken and learned a valuable lesson: when there’s a clump of green stuff on your lunch in San Antonio, it’s guacamole. On a Japanese airline, it’s wasabi. She recovered and will never make that mistake again :)

One of the cool things JAL does is show you the camera view from the front of the plane during take off and landing. It’s pretty cool to watch, especially when you can see things like the Golden Gate bridge. When we were approaching Beijing last night, they turned it on again. It was dark so you could see the city below but couldn’t yet see the airport. The pilot made a sweeping turn and as he straightened out the plane, the amazingly bright lights of the Beijing airport came into view. I’m sure it was the sleep deprivation and weird fish eggs I’d just eaten, but I got all choked up thinking that this was the proverbial Light at the End of the Tunnel for us. Normally communist China is not a beacon of hope and promise, but landing here for us last night was.

Thank you Jesus for your amazing sovereignty and grace, and for getting us here safely. Watch over us as we tour Beijing, give us supernatural energy as we fight through the jet lag and let us bond with our travel group. Most of all Lord, continue to prepare Lily for the change that’s about to happen for her. Thank you for your perfect provision and many blessings, and allow us to reflect You on this trip. Amen.

Baby Husky

2010-03-11T17:43:00.002-06:00

This UW outfit (aka "my Husky jacket and Husky pants") was a hand-me-down I think from 3 cousins ago, and originally from the Ferrantes NW, our relatives in Seattle, and Lily LOVES it. Thankfully her obsession has coincided with an uncharacteristically long winter, so at least it's been weather-appropriate. Since it has started to get warm this week, I secretly put it in what she calls the baby clothes closet but guess what the first words out of her mouth were when she woke up from her nap this afternoon: "I want to wear my Husky pants!" I mean, does she dream of clothes? Is that normal? Anyway, of course I dragged them out, and off we go to the grocery store in 80 degree weather in a lined track suit.

At least it matches-- today she went to music class in size 5 heather gray cargo sweat pants (she is a 3T) and a beige Madeline shirt (she doesn't even know who Madeline is, she just has an obsession with character tees, just to spite me I think). She looked like she was dressed for the bus stop (and I don't mean the school bus). It wouldn't be half as embarassing if her music class wasn't on the Janie & Jack side of town, you know, where all the moms are in $90 sweat pants and the kids are in (matching) catalog outfits that can't even be bought in stores. You know the kind. I don't judge them of course-- to each his own style. You can keep your rich kid look, we'll stick with bus stop.

Bath Time

2010-03-09T20:06:00.004-06:00

"Take a picture of my foot!"

This is her fake laugh face.

Thought I'd lighten things up a bit with some bath time photos, which we haven't done in years. Ok, perhaps I'm exaggerating a bit since we are a week shy of having been with Lily for two years (Can you believe it'll be two years next Wednesday??)

Lily says "Lemme see!" after each picture snaps, and I think for the first time tonight she saw how fun it was to look at cute smiling pictures instead of brain-dead looking ones, so I think that's why there are so many good pics. Enjoy!

When Lily Gets Big...

2010-03-07T12:25:00.005-06:00

I love to make up songs for Lily, and when she was younger and hated being in the car for a long time, it was one of the few things that would brighten her mood. One of the songs she still loves goes like this:

When Lily gets big she's gonna ride a tractor

Ride a tractor, ride a tractor

When Lily gets big she's gonna ride a tractor

To work on the farm

As you can see from these pictures, that song absolutely tickles her still. And it got us to think, like every parent does, about what we want her to be, who we want her to be. Every parent does this, we dream of who our children will become and then we think about how we can influence those dreams into becoming reality. We teach them how to share with their friends so they will get along well with others. We help them with their homework so they'll know education is important. We sign them up for activities so they'll have many opportunities. We even force them to shower when they enter the stinky stage because, for crying outloud, what kind of person would want to marry someone who doesn't bathe?? Don't they know we are just trying to ensure that they will be successful in life? And that we just want her to be happy?

Lord, I hope not.

What??

We don't want our kids to be happy or successful? Well, we don't pray for Lily to be plagued with melancholy or misfortune, but this blog post by another mom captures beautifully why we don't, in fact, just want Lily to be happy. This is something we've been chewing on since seeing this wise man speak about raising truly great kids the very weekend before we left for China. (See, I told you we were better parents before we actually had kids).

While we don't want Lily to be unhappy or unsuccessful, we will purposely not teach her to chase after happiness or success as if they were the most important thing. Have you ever known somebody who had every reason to be happy and yet they weren't? Or a successful person who was miserable? Or conversely, someone who had every reason to be miserable, yet their joy was pure and contagious? Who would you rather your daughter marry-- a successful man or a great man?

That's what we're after. A child who longs to be great in the eyes of her Real Father. An adult who has joy in spite of her circumstances. You don't have to be 35 to know that circumstances happen to everyone (I know this because I'm only 34 and 362/365ths). At the very least, knees will be scraped and girls will be cruel, and at the very worst, a mom places her newborn on the ground, then turns and walks away. Horrifyingly unfair, yes, but unexpected, no. In John 16:33 Jesus said, "In this world you will have trouble." It's coming. And for many with a start like Lily's, it's already come. So how do we equip our kids to do what the rest of that verse says, to "Take heart?" in spite of the fact that troubles are sure to come?

We will teach her what the rest of the verse means: that Jesus has overcome the world. Bad things are going to happen, so we will not teach Lily to strive for happiness alone, as that would be futile, and even ridiculous in the face of difficult circumstances. Rather, we will teach her what the Bible has to say about joy. In my concordance there is less than one half of one column of references to the word happy but nearly an entire page of references to joy. Nehemiah 8:10 says, "Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength." Joy in the Lord can be found in the midst of grief. And John 16:33 reminds us that we can take heart when we face troubles because Jesus has overcome this world filled with sadness, sin, heartache and grief. Those things are real, but thanks be to God, they are temporary. Our real home is in heaven, where Jesus is preparing a room for each of His children. He has promised to return for us and bring us with Him. And maybe, just maybe, He'll need someone to work the tractors there.

And when He does return for His own, "success" isn't going to be what Jesus uses to determine who goes back to Heaven with Him. Even placing that aside, when troubles arise-- I mean the real ones-- losing a baby, a spouse, a parent-- success isn't going to be a comfort whatsoever.

In practical terms, does this mean we will encourage Lily to be a total slacker? Of course not, as that would not fall under the definition of glorifying God (says the lady who is being a horrible slacker by blogging all afternoon instead of the work I should be doing). It means that if Lily decides she is the heir to George Harrell Construction, then we will not respond like we may want to, like how could she waste that good hair, being stuck underneath a hard hat all day (What Kyle? That's not what you were thinking?) If we raise her to be great instead of successful, then we have no reason to be sad that she may want to "waste" her good hair or her Ivy League education pushing down trees with a dozer.

If we were to raise Lily to think it was her job to get good grades, do a bunch of activities to pad her college applications, get into a good school, get a great job, attract a good mate, etc., then we are teaching her that she is the focus of her world. Rather, if we teach her that her job on Earth (her temporary home), is to glorify her Father, share His Good News, and love and care for those around her, then suddenly things like college and activities take their proper place: as by-products of her primary job: to glorify her Father with her gifts. College may be included in His plan for her. So may a huge salary at her job in astrophysics (to pay for a tutor for her mom so I will even know what that means) but they will not be an end unto themselves. Happiness and success may follow. But when grief does too, may she be able to say, "The joy of the Lord is my strength."

Gymnastics

2010-03-04T11:22:00.002-06:00

Not that I got any great shots, but I finally remembered to bring the camera to gymnastics so I thought I'd share. Lily is really improving, which is fun to see, although there are some new kids who have joined the class that Lily loves to copy. That would be great if they were good examples to copy, but one kid runs to her mom after every move, another sits and sulks until it's her turn and the newest kid does somersaults without any involvement from her arms.

Lily's favorite seems to be the rings, and she can hang up there for what seems like a ridiculous amount of time. She gets in trouble for that, as well as for her dismounts. "Miss Lily, are we supposed to land on our bottoms?" Sweet Miss Helen is extraordinarliy patient with the herd of squid that she is responsible for and I have no idea how she is so nice to them. Lily loves her. One day we found a NCAA meet on tv and Lily looked at me with awe-filled wide eyes and said, "Is that Miss Helen?"

So kudos to Grammie and Grandy and Uncle Kevin for choosing a birthday gift that keeps giving!

Baseball Ready!

2010-03-04T10:50:00.002-06:00

Super Fans 1 and 2

Lily and Uncle Davey (and a big gob of sunflower seeds)

Showing off the baseball that the cute college girls painted on her cheek.

We went to our the Texas State home opener last night and this little Bobcat was definitely baseball ready. We met some friends at their tailgate beforehand and Lily kept saying she was ready to get to the field. She's Super Fan.

A cultural difference that Kyle and I have noticed between us is baseball cheers. For instance, he yells, "Wooden eye!" when someone's at bat. What?? As in, I hope one of yours isn't so you can hit the ball? Or as in, keep your eye so focused on the ball that it looks like a tree? Not sure, but I am sure that is not an familiar baseball yell in my culture of origin and I will not be making it my own.

One thing we do agree on is that the apparently nouveau chant of "Baseball ready!" is not cool and is not one we'll be introducing into our new family baseball culture. Lily is mostly a fan of yelling, "Go Bobcats!" whenever she thinks of it, and I laugh every time.

We also love the song hazing that the very funny baseball coaches practice on the freshman in the form of picking the song to be played as each comes to bat. Lily's favorite is the Circle of Life, Kyle's is the song about the lovely lady humps. Lily rocks out to every single one, and I'm quite sure said players do not appreciate the song choices as much as we do.

Until the next game, we'll keep our lovely lady humps and wooden eyes baseball ready.

Two Dogs

2010-02-15T18:04:00.005-06:00

What's better than the 4 dogs our 3 families already have? Two more! Yes, they're cute but unfortunately for the kids (and Rara) they were just visiting. My brother offered to dogsit for his friend who was here with her boyfriend while he worked. The girls especially loved Delilah and Delta, whom Lily called Deelilah and Shelta, the latter perhaps as a nod to the dogs' dad??

Rodeo!

2010-02-15T16:52:00.005-06:00

Lily enjoyed introducing her city cousins to tractors.

Notice the seatbelt. It's safety first for the Canady men.

Lily sat on either Danny or Tahra's lap 90% of the rodeo. While we know she loves them, I'm pretty sure it had quite a bit to do with the high rate of treats that kept appearing in their row. She's no dummy.

This little piggy went to the Farm Bureau Fun Land...

And she brought her cousins.

Oldest brother, oldest daughter
Oldest brother, oldest son

A rare moment for the camera, both Littles smiling, and at least one of my mom's eyes open (she's going to kill me)

This was our third year in a row going as a family to the Rodeo. Lily missed the first year since it was right before we went to China, and my dad missed this year since stadium stairs aren't that fun with a cane. I offered for Kyle to carry him in the B'jorn but for some reason he declined. This was Kevin's first year to be with us too, although he was working so he wasn't really with us (but we saw him working which is always fun).

We walked around a bit before the rodeo started, then again before the Blake Shelton show started. Lily loved watching the horses in the rodeo (and kept asking if she could ride one) and rocked out during Blake's show after she got used to how loud it was. We went to the Means' for dinner afterwards so it was an action-packed day. Lily fell asleep before her head even hit the pillow when we got home but we're still tired. I'm planning a 7pm bedtime tonight.

We walked past some tables where some rodeo contestants (why can't we just call them cowboys?) were signing autographs so I walked up with Lily and asked if she wanted to shake a real cowboy's hand. She stuck her hand out to the 5-year-old boy in front of her with a hat and boots on. Priceless.

Thank you Uncle Danny for our tickets, Uncle Kevin for the tickets for our friends, and Nanni Cindy for dinner for all of us!

Happy Chinese New Year & Valentine's Day!

2010-02-14T09:07:00.005-06:00

This picture sums up the Harrell family's culture. And don't worry-- we'll be following the Chinese New Year tradition of getting a haircut today! We're also headed to the stock show and rodeo so check back for pictures later this week.

Uncle Kevin's in town this week so he got to join our Chinese New Year celebration for the first time. Here he's cleaning shrimp for a delicious spicy Sichuan shrimp dish.
Nana and Isabel were chefing on the other side of the kitchen. Isabel made fried rice and my mom was putting the finishing touches on sweet and sour pork.

Marlow is showing off what has become a Chinese New Year dessert tradition- chocolate filled wontons. Yum!

The sweet little centerpiece my mom put together.

A rose by any other name

2010-02-10T08:32:00.005-06:00

Lily's life continues to be one long game of betend. Her favorite pretend name is Lusa which she uses when she's playing pretend with the dogs- a game that involves dragging them around by their leashes inside the house. It usually ends when they suddenly run after something and she forgets to let go of the leash. Lusa is also the name she'll tell you when you ask what an unnamed stuffed animal is called.

She also likes to add "Miss" to the beginning of peoples' names, which works for men and women alike. She called our construction supervisor, Ramon, "Miss 'amon" during the entire month that our windows and doors were being replaced.

When she's in the mood, she can be quite conversational with new people. One of her favorite questions is, "What you dog's name?" She asked that question to one of my parents' friends at church who said she didn't have a dog, and Lily was thoroughly confused. She usually follows that question up with an invite: "You can come to my house!"

When she's not being chatty and charming to new people, she likes to trick them into thinking she's in a near-vegetative state (see middle picture). She gets this glazed-over look and she speaks in monosyllabic baby words, like "Guh" with her tongue protruding. If the people don't really know us, you can see what's going through their minds: "Oh, bless their hearts for adopting such a severely special needs child." It's awesome.

Pictures courtesy of Uncle Davey

I Loved This Kid from Day One - But Why?

2010-02-05T13:41:00.002-06:00

We received The Call two years ago yesterday, and two years ago today we saw Lily's face for the first time. What a day. After two years I am still overcome by the emotion of finally seeing the sweet face of the child who I had prayed for for so long.

But as I reflect back, I ponder how much my love for Lily is based on what I get back from her, and thus, not the kind of love that Jesus expects me to give.

The overwhelming response to Lily's adoption was positive."We're just so happy for you!" "You'll be such great parents!" "She's so cute!" "She's so smart!"

It seemed to make sense that we would be blessed with such a wonderful adoption experience and a great kid, because, well, didn't we deserve it? We are good Christians, we have enough room, enough money, enough family support. We have plenty to give.

And we expect plenty in return.

What?

Yes, in our humanity, we expect to receive in exchange for what we give. We get smiles, hugs, compliments from others. We get a lot back from this kid.

What if we couldn't?

What if we adopted a child that didn't fit our expectations of what we all hope for our children, or who didn't fit our definition of "what we deserve"? Would reactions like "I'm so happy for them, they deserve this" turn into "What were they thinking, bringing a child like that into their home?" "Don't they realize how hard it's going to be?" "What, are they trying to save the world? Sheesh, they have to think about their family."

Do we have the capacity to choose to love without expecting anything in return? Do we have the capacity to choose to love a child who will bring more "whys" than "oooohs and aaahhs"? Or am I obedient only when it fits into what I dreamed for my family? Only when it matches what my friends and family expect from my family.

I heard a speaker this morning talk about her love for her only daughter, who has very limited capacity due to a traumatic brain injury, compared to her love for her sons who are "normal." She confessed that her love for her sons had a lot less in common than the standard of love that Jesus has set. She has very high expectations from her sons, very few for her daughter. Jesus not only has very few expectations for what He can get from us, he has ZERO, and yet He loves us lavishly. And He commanded us to love each other as He has loved us. Undeservedly. Without regard for what we'll get in return. And lavishly.

Ouch. So what does that mean?

Unfortunately, I think it means that we need to keep praying that God will show us how to love without expectation, without regard for what we'll get in return. This is not some circumvented way of announcing our next adoption (although I wish it was). But will you please join us in praying that not just Kyle and I, but the whole Church, the entire body of believers would learn to love orphans as Jesus has loved us- undeservedly, without regard for what we'll get in return. And lavishly.

Happy Referral-iversary to us!

2010-02-04T09:41:00.005-06:00

Her serious face then....

Her serious face now...

Her sweet face now!
If you weren't around 2 years ago, read my referral posts to re-live the awesomeness that happened 2 years ago today (and tomorrow, since our agency is anti-scanner and we didn't get her pics till the next day). I just remember thinking that she looked like ours. And I remember thinking how dirty her shoes were in the pictures. Funny, that's the first thing that Lily notices when she looks at her referral pictures too.

As amazingly fun as it was to learn who Lily was two years ago, it does not even begin to match up to how fun it has been to be her mom. And the depths of my frustration and despair at the 3 year wait pale in comparison to the depths of trust in God that I have since learned. If I had to wait three years again, I would. But this time I'd spend all the energy I wasted last time fretting, learning more about the God who created me and my children. Staring at His "dossier" makes it impossible to be bitter. And no matter how many charts and graphs I analyzed, I never predicted correctly when our referral would come anyway. The only thing that proved true were the dreams that the Lord gave me of a Christmas baby who was actually a toddler.

And in case you're still waiting for your child and you're thinking, "Easy for her to say now!" I have a chance to put my new trust to the test as we wait for Lily's little brother. I invite you to remind me of this post when I start fretting over Little Brother, as surely I will need constant reminders! Thankfully in addition to your reminders and the Holy Spirit, I have another ever-present, and very chatty, reminder of His faithfulness. Thank you Lord for being my ever-present help, and thank you for Lily!

What did she just say?

2010-02-01T09:56:00.005-06:00

The munchkins, watching TV one morning last week. They looked so cute, snuggled up side by side with their blankies. And yes, Lily has fingers in each nostril. What can I say, it's warm in there and we've had a really long winter.

Lily's ever-expanding conversational abilities crack us up almost every day. I just realized that I post a lot of them on faceb*ok but not here, so here are some of the recent more memorable moments:

Me: Lily do you like your new kitchen window?

(we just had our windows replaced)

Lily: (turning around to look at it) Wow! I LOVE it!

Me: You do?

Lily: I totally do!

*********

While tucking her in:

Me: Goodnight Lil! I'm right downstairs if you need anything.

Lily: I need anything!

Me, to myself: That's what you get for asking!

********

"I have a broken finger cut!"

(a broken nail)

********

Lily, while reading her Bible before bed: I'm going to read this pink part.

Me: Great idea, those are the words that Jesus said. What did He say?

Lily: Jesus said, 'No more monkeys jumping on the bed!'

*********

While my dad was playing with Lily and Blake, who had made a pretend bridge that Jesus was crossing (?).

My dad: Where is Jesus going? To Bethlehem or Jerusalem?

Blake: Jerusalem!

Lily: No, Jesus is going to WalM*rt!

Me: Hello BSF? Yes, I have a 3 year old that needs to be enrolled, STAT!

********

There are countless others that I just can't seem to store in my ever-inefficient brain.

Someday I'm going to look back at turning 35 and think it was silly that I felt old,

but it is embarrassing that I already can't remember anything.

I'm going to be an absolutely ridiculous old lady.

In other news, next week I will have another new-mom first:

standing in line to register Lily for pre-school for the Fall.

I had her on a waiting list this year but she never got in,

so it's time to make sure it happens for next year.

In the meantime, I'm trying not to get too excited about having two mornings a week to clean house by myself. I'm not succeeding.

I followed the lazy girl's guide to researching pre-schools:

1) Locate and befriend Smart Girls

2) Confirm that they are Type-A

3) Find out where their kids go to pre-school

4) Make sure they like it

5) Register Lily at said pre-school

Just my luck, Tow Truck will come home in the Fall and

my plans to be home alone will evaporate.

Not that I wouldn't be thrilled if Nepal started moving again and Little Bro made an appearance in 2010, but it would be ironic timing. But if he doesn't, I will so enjoy Tuesdays and Thursdays starting in September. I mean, I totally enjoy them now, along with every other minute I spend with my darling daughter, but you know what I mean. I can't confirm this, but I've heard that breaks are awesome.

So either way, I'm good: two mornings a week home alone with my new son, or two mornings a week home alone with my swivel sweeper and steam mop.

What could be better??

Weekend with the Clarks

2010-01-23T10:03:00.005-06:00

The featured attraction of the day: worker guys and tractors.

Our house has settled into a very sad quiet this morning since we tucked the Clark Crew into their car for their drive home :( They spent the last couple of days with us and we had SO much fun.

Lily and Jake (3 1/2) got along famously (they hardly noticed the rest of us were here), and sweet baby Sam (who I guess isn't really a baby anymore at 18 months, but he's so snuggly that I'm going to pray he stays that way for a long time!) was a perfect little gem, keeping himself plenty busy even when the big kids didn't let him in on their fun. Blake came to the zoo with us yesterday, and in this case, three was definitely not a crowd-- they all played together so well, betending to be lions while they looked for the lions.

The kids weren't the only ones to have fun-- we went on a double date with Jon and Carrie last night while the kids were home with a sitter (thanks Katie!!!) and we had a great time. Dinner was delicious and it was a beautiful night to be out on the Riverwalk (which I forget actually is cool, since I'm trained as a snobby Californian to roll my eyes at all things touristy). Just because the masses like it doesn't mean I can't. Just don't tell anyone.

I anticipate lots of stories about Jake and Sam in the coming weeks, and all three of us are already looking forward to our next visit with the Clark Crew!

Will you do something simple and powerful for orphans today?

2010-01-15T07:31:00.003-06:00

Half the Sky is the organization, based out of the Bay Area, that provided a nanny to love and nurture Lily from the time she was 3 months old until we arrived to bring her home one year later. Those were crucial months for Lily to learn that she could trust an adult to provide for her needs. We met this nanny and I wrote about it and posted pictures in two separate posts. While Lily still had a long road to a healthy, secure attachment with us, I shudder to think how much worse it could have been had Miss Wang not been there to hold her, make eye contact with her and make sure she was learning simple developmental milestones which we American moms and dads take for granted that "just happen" with our babies.

I dare you to watch the Half the Sky video above and read my post about meeting Miss Wang without voting for Half the Sky. If you are able to withstand my challenge and not take 90 seconds to vote after coming face to face with a family blessed by this organization, post a comment and I'll send you a heater to melt your cold, cold heart! ;)

The hundreds of thousands of orphans that will be helped by this money if Half the Sky wins, and their future mamas, thank you!

Ravioli Factory

2010-01-09T19:14:00.002-06:00

Isabel was a dough-rolling machine.

We used to make ravioli as a family between Christmas and New Years, but we haven't done it since my Uncle Joe's family was here for Christmas two years ago. Thank goodness for wild hairs, because my mom got one somewhere so we decided to make them last Sunday.

When the whole extended family was involved, each person had one distinct role in the process: someone made the dough, someone else made the filling, someone rolled, etc. But instead of 25 hungry Sicilians, only the Canady girls were involved this time so we each got to do some new things.

My mom made the dough and filling, Isabel rolled out the dough (she has some serious muscles hidden in those long, skinny arms! Yes, I'm jealous.), I made the little grid lines, Marlow and I cut and Tahra transferred them to pans for cooking or freezing. They were unbelievably delicious- I think we ate a pound each.

Monterey relatives, are you listening-- the ravioli in Texas are awesome. I dare you to come taste for yourselves...

Lily Jill Retton

2010-01-09T09:32:00.002-06:00

I didn't want to be the rookie mom who brings the camera to gymnastics on the very first day (you know that ridiculous mom that all the experienced ones laugh at- yeah, I have a complex about being That Mom.) Instead Kyle and I were the ridiculous parents who clapped for their daughter every time she pointed her toes. I'm not kidding. But what's worse, it was solicited. This kid has major clapformeitis. And I'm not naming any names, but let's just say she gets it honest. One of her parents just so happens to be an only child who still gets applause from his extraordinarily proud parents every time he goes big potty. (And her other parent is about to get in big trouble for saying that in public).

Anyway, speaking of proud parents, I will definitely be bringing both the still and the video camera next week because I'm pretty sure you've never seen anything cuter than Lily strutting around those mats in that precious little leotard. She was able to do most of the things the teacher asked, even if she did try to take extra turns every now and then. And while there were no round off back handsprings this time, they are working on real apparatuses, like beams and bars. (I'm pretty sure we didn't do that stuff in 1978 at the Monterey Youth Center). Anyway, I'm expecting a call from Bella Karoli within the month, so I'll keep you posted.

Sincerely,

George & Phyllis Jr.

An Official Texan

2010-01-08T20:12:00.003-06:00

No caption needed...

The whole group swearing something to the judge

Note the strain on her face, trying to wrangle the gavel from my hands, and the fear in the judge's eyes that she would be successful.

Nana trying to wrangle the kids out of the courthouse.

We readopted Lily today, which means she will now have a Texas birth certificate in addition to her Chinese birth certificate. It was fun to do it as a group with a bunch of our friends, although it was slightly chaotic (think: many small children and their associated grown-ups in a confined judges chambers).

Slumber Party Cakes

2010-01-08T19:07:00.004-06:00

I got the idea from my friend Alissa to make these cute little cakes for Isabel's sleep over tonight. Isabel requested spice cake, so I made a modified version of this recipe, cut it in sixths and draped it with some fondant. The heads could have been better-- they are a little large and I should have mixed in some color, but it was the end of naptime at that point, so I was racing the clock. I look forward to trying these again! (Hint hint, Marlow, have a slumber party in June!)

Our Little Jockey

2010-01-08T18:19:00.002-06:00

Perhaps it had something to do with the uncharacteristically freezing weather we've been having, but Lily found this hat the other day and wore it during her morning ride on Candy Cane (who is also referred to as Pine Cone when he's a mean horsey. How does she come up with this stuff??). You can see from the top picture that she wasn't trying to be silly, this was serious jockey practice. Something tells me she'd be the first jockey who was in the 60th percentile for height at age 3...